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A Mother's day question. https://gladerebooted.net/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=2777 |
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Author: | Foamy [ Wed Apr 28, 2010 5:19 pm ] |
Post subject: | A Mother's day question. |
*Long rambling post incoming* You have been warned!!! As many here may know by my posting history, I haven't cared much, if even at all, for my mother for many years. Up to last year, with the birth of my first son, Mother's day has been a truly worthless day to me. I ask this question of all here, but more specifically those who still have their mothers alive, children of their own and a good relationship with said children's mother. How should a man, as I have described above, feel on Mother's day? Should he feel closer to his own mother or should the mother of his children be the more important person? For these many years, I have "gone through the motions" so to speak, on Mother's day. Whatever my dad said to keep my mother quiet, whether it was a card or a flower or cooking dinner. I did it and Oonagh followed along just for the sake of making Mother's day (for my mother) a decent day. This year is Oonagh's second Mother's day as a true mother. (Last year's came the day after we brought our new baby home, so I didn't really have the time or the ability to do much then) This year will, for our intents and purposes, be our first Mother's day. I feel toward Oonagh something that I will NEVER EVER feel for my own mother. My mother is a needy person who has had a "yes man" (My dad) around her for years now. He simply does and says whatever is necessary to keep her content and damn his own needs. So I wonder, how should a man feel in a normal situation, that is love for both his mother and the mother of his children? This is something that I can not associate with at all I want to do on Mother's day is to just go through the motions to keep my mother quiet. This saddens me because it takes time away from me showing the person who truly means the most to me...My wonderful wife and the mother to my son. Thanks for listening to my ramblings. |
Author: | damaged [ Wed Apr 28, 2010 5:23 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Meh, I chalk it up as another Hallmark holiday. Maybe call, preferably when I know they're out, and leave a message. |
Author: | Jasmy [ Wed Apr 28, 2010 5:32 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: A Mother's day question. |
Foamy just send your mother a simple card and spend your time and energies with the mother that means the world to you, Oonagh! |
Author: | Müs [ Wed Apr 28, 2010 6:03 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: A Mother's day question. |
Jasmy wrote: Foamy just send your mother a simple card and spend your time and energies with the mother that means the world to you, Oonagh! This. I don't know that I'd even send a card though. |
Author: | Lenas [ Wed Apr 28, 2010 6:08 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Feel however you feel, man. It doesn't have to be some grandiose day/event. I have a good relationship with my mom, but I still just tell her I love her and send her to a baseball game or something. Oonagh should be your focus, and frankly, the only person you should be concerned with on the day. |
Author: | Rynar [ Wed Apr 28, 2010 6:25 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
I love my mother, and try to show her that, every day. Same with the other moms in my life. If you need a special day to acknowledge that kind of love, then you aren't doing it right. |
Author: | Lydiaa [ Wed Apr 28, 2010 6:42 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: A Mother's day question. |
My dad is in a similar situation with you, he just normally buys a spa treatment for both women (seperate locations of course), and makes me cook dinner when the wife (my mum) gets back. They seem to both be fine with this arrangement. edit. Forgot to add, this also gives dad the day free to do the things he wants. He doesnt have to listen to the "your mum said this... your mum did this... " which normally happends on this day. |
Author: | Taskiss [ Thu Apr 29, 2010 5:31 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Who's your mom? That's the person that should get the appreciation on mothers day. |
Author: | LadyKate [ Thu Apr 29, 2010 7:17 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Foamy, knowing your mother's behavior...do WHATEVER you can minimally get away with to appease her on Mother's Day so that your wife can enjoy her first full Mother's Day! If you ignore your own mother, she is bound to make Oonagh's day a living nightmare (she may already have plans to do so...) so maybe get your mom a card and some flowers, have them sent over that morning and take your wife and your son out somewhere and turn your cell phones off for the day. This is Oonagh's day. Your mother has had many of them, your wife has not. |
Author: | Oonagh [ Thu Apr 29, 2010 7:29 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: |
Taskiss wrote: Who's your mom? Foamy's mom? Well she is a cross between a screaming banshee, a harpy, and Lilith. Any questions? |
Author: | Kirra [ Thu Apr 29, 2010 7:42 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: |
Taskiss wrote: Who's your mom? That's the person that should get the appreciation on mothers day. Too literal... Oonagh trumps in this case, because she is the mother of his child. Foamys mom doesn't sound like she leaves and good mother feelings around, so give her a card and pamper Oonagh |
Author: | Colphax [ Thu Apr 29, 2010 9:04 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Foamy, shift your focus a little. Look at it this way: do (minimally) what you have to do to keep mom quiet and out of the way so that you can focus on Oonagh. Don't do this for your mother, do this for Oonagh. A gift is freely given to show love and respect. A "gift" that is expected or demanded is bribery. So pay off your mother as a gift to Oonagh, and the whole deal takes on a new meaning...one your mother need never know. |
Author: | Oonagh [ Thu Apr 29, 2010 12:17 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: |
Colphax wrote: Foamy, shift your focus a little. Look at it this way: do (minimally) what you have to do to keep mom quiet and out of the way so that you can focus on Oonagh. Don't do this for your mother, do this for Oonagh. A gift is freely given to show love and respect. A "gift" that is expected or demanded is bribery. So pay off your mother as a gift to Oonagh, and the whole deal takes on a new meaning...one your mother need never know. "and the truth shall set you free." AMEN |
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