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Frustrations.
https://gladerebooted.net/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=6051		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Screeling [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 9:00 am ]
Post subject:  Frustrations.
A lot of frustrations right now.

    My Biology teacher quit mid-semester so I'm getting used to a new prof with a grade hovering around 93%. It's just enough to make me sweat.

    I got a promotion about 6 months ago that was about an increase in the 5-figure range. I have yet to get the raise despite doing the work. I know at least 10 others (out of 200 total) that are in the same boat I am. Everybody I work for is fighting for it, but Corporate is playing games with us.

    I'm worried about the company I work for because we're losing good employees, nobody's gotten a merit raise in almost 3 years, and like me - no pay-bumps with promotions. We just purchased another company and are going to pour resources into integrating their product. And people are... pissed.

    I'm passing up job opportunities for better money/benefits because I'm trying to get to med school and can't afford the instability of a new work environment.

    My 2-month old still won't go to sleep at a consistent time. It makes it difficult for my wife and I to get exercise on top of the things we have to do. I feel like even scheduling an appointment to get laid would be worthless because the boy would start screaming in the middle of it.

    My wife isn't doing enough to take care of the house while she stays home with him on her maternity leave. I don't hassle her on this (yet) but she isn't trying to maximize her productivity while he's asleep.

    I've come to the conclusion that my 2 years of volunteering in the Medical Staff Office at the hospital has been an almost complete waste of time. I was asked to help there because of some unique software knowledge and at the time I had a doctor helping me learn things in there he believed would be helpful later. Well, he's been dead a while now and this volunteer position is neither clinical nor research related. I'll have to do my best to make it sound like it helped my leadership ability. But this won't look good on a med school application.

    My church of a few thousand people can't seem to consistently get 20 people to volunteer for the Saturday night service to help in the Sunday School. So I feel guilty whenever I need a day off to study because I know it hurts everybody else.

    My wife's car is going to take a dump soon. I can't get a new car because I'm not making the money I thought I would be in lieu of the company screwing me and my wife not being back to work yet. We have savings, but we're burning through it faster than I anticipated. I'm not worried about money, just upset about losing ground on saving.

    I need a break over the summer but I won't get one because I have to take 8 credits or else add another year to graduate.

I'm not worried about burn-out. I'd just like to be a little happier when I wake up in the morning. The only good thing lately is my new boss seems really supportive of my school goals. He lets me play weird schedule games to accommodate the university class times. This means I will likely be able to graduate in 2 years and hopefully matriculate into med school in Fall of 2014. Yet it still seems an eternity away.
Author:  darksiege [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 11:59 am ]
Post subject: 
/manhugs

Wish I had some advice for you man.
Author:  Arathain Kelvar [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 12:02 pm ]
Post subject: 
Some advice is to leave the lady alone about the house. She's probably not getting that much sleep, very stressed, very tired, very hormonal. The house can be dirty for a while.
Author:  LadyKate [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 12:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re:
Arathain Kelvar wrote:
Some advice is to leave the lady alone about the house. She's probably not getting that much sleep, very stressed, very tired, very hormonal. The house can be dirty for a while.


This is true. On top of the baby and lack of sleep, her body has been through hell and back with pregnancy and childbirth. It will take her at least 6 months for her hormones and her body to get back to where they were...her body is working overtime. I know that's frustrating for you, as a man, because you think you'd just power through it if it were you....you're just going to have to take it on faith that she needs rest right now and will continue to need it for a few more months.

Also, and I hate to chuckle here, but you're going to have to learn to tune out the baby crying sometimes if you want to squeeze in a quickie with your wife. You'll get used to it. ;)

Sounds like you have a lot of stress in your life right now. I've never met anyone with high ambitions who didn't also have a lot of stress to go with it.

Have you thought about finding some new and creative outlets for your stress from work and school so you don't take it home with you?
Author:  Corolinth [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 12:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Frustrations.
Keep your stick on the ice.
Author:  Arathain Kelvar [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 3:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Re:
LadyKate wrote:
Have you thought about finding some new and creative outlets for your stress from work and school so you don't take it home with you?


That's why "stopping for a beer with the fellas" was invented.
Author:  Micheal [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 4:44 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hey, at least its good fodder for your future Nobel prize biography, right sir?
Author:  Rynar [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 7:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Re:
Arathain Kelvar wrote:
LadyKate wrote:
Have you thought about finding some new and creative outlets for your stress from work and school so you don't take it home with you?


That's why "stopping for a beer with the fellas" was invented.


That's the one!
Author:  Taskiss [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 7:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re:
Arathain Kelvar wrote:
Some advice is to leave the lady alone about the house. She's probably not getting that much sleep, very stressed, very tired, very hormonal. The house can be dirty for a while.

Yeah, think about it - if that's your biggest ***** where she's concerned, well, there's tons worse could come calling.
Author:  Rynar [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 7:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Re:
Taskiss wrote:
Arathain Kelvar wrote:
Some advice is to leave the lady alone about the house. She's probably not getting that much sleep, very stressed, very tired, very hormonal. The house can be dirty for a while.

Yeah, think about it - if that's your biggest ***** where she's concerned, well, there's tons worse could come calling.


Hire a cleaning service, expect that to make your wife happy. If your wife ***** about the expense instead, explain to her that you feel like the house should always look meticulous but think it would be an unfair demand to make of her. If she doesn't want to spend the money, she'll start doing more cleaning. Either way, problem solved.

Oh, and wash the windows yourself.
Author:  Sam [ Thu Apr 21, 2011 8:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Frustrations.
On the "promotion" thing.....from my experience, never accept a "promotion" with promised pay increase unless it's in writing. I've been in that boat, done the work for over a year without seeing a penny until threatening to quit doing said work, or quit altogether, then I got a fraction of promised increase after the fact with no backpay for work done.

I figured I lost around 3 or 4 grand outta that deal, and that was 15 years ago......so was a lot of money to me back then.
Author:  Kirra [ Fri Apr 22, 2011 2:57 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Frustrations.
I know you are frustrated with all those things...but don't make things worse by jumping on your wife about not "maximizing her productivity" when the baby is sleeping. You are in for a world of hurt if you go down that path. She is probably not getting enough sleep and with hormones combined... Just try to be as positive as you can. Babies usually don't have a routine at 2 months old. Might as well get used to that.

Get your exercise when you can, that will help relieve stress for both you and your wife. Trade off watching the baby so you each can exercise, or get a relative to watch the baby for a couple of times a week?

Good luck and rant here as much as you need to, just getting your frustrations out, even someplace like here can help.

I'm praying for you, take care Screeling.
Author:  Stathol [ Wed Apr 27, 2011 3:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Frustrations.
Screeling wrote:
My 2-month old still won't go to sleep at a consistent time. It makes it difficult for my wife and I to get exercise on top of the things we have to do. I feel like even scheduling an appointment to get laid would be worthless because the boy would start screaming in the middle of it.


You should try this heartwarming childrens' book:

Go the **** to Sleep by Adam Mansbach

Quote:
Go the **** To Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don't always send a toddler sailing off to dreamland. Honest, profane, and affectionate, Adam Mansbach's verses and Ricardo Cortés' illustrations perfectly capture the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night, and open up a conversation about parenting in the process. Beautiful, subversive, and pants-wettingly funny, Go the **** to Sleep is a perfect gift for parents new, old, or expectant. Here is a sample verse:

The cats nestle close to their kittens now.
The lambs have laid down with the sheep.
You're cozy and warm in your bed, my dear
Please go the **** to sleep.
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