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"Routine" e-mail from my SiL
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Author:  Squirrel Girl [ Fri Dec 02, 2011 10:13 am ]
Post subject:  "Routine" e-mail from my SiL
My brother's wife sent me an e-mail this morning.

A month ago she underwent surgery for uterine cancer. She told no one outside of of my brother and nephew. They in turn told no one.

The cancer spread to her lymph nodes so she is going to receive chemotherapy and radiation therapy.

*beats head against wall*

My other brother, his wife, and I are all physicians. There is NO excuse for this to have become metastatic. Any woman who starts to have vaginal bleeding (a "period") after menopause need immediate evaluation. My SiL know this because I told her about Pat in my office who developed those symptoms. When Pat asked me about that I told her she was going to call her Gyn and leave to her office that afternoon. When Pat told me she got an appointment for 6 weeks later, I got on the phone, told the Gyn's front office person that Pat had untreated uterine cancer and need to be seen immediately. Pat was seen that day, and had surgery 2 days after that.

So she does not ask questions; does not get treatment, and does not even get emotional support.

*returns to beating head against wall*
Author:  Killuas [ Fri Dec 02, 2011 12:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: "Routine" e-mail from my SiL
Sorry to hear this SG. Some people ignore things hoping it will go away or get better on its own and don't want to face reality or are too afraid to face it. While it can be frustrating reminding them that you are there for them and supporting them (and not lecturing them on what could have been) is what they really need now.

I hope it works out OK for her.
Author:  Taskiss [ Fri Dec 02, 2011 12:41 pm ]
Post subject: 
Unfortunately, I'd probably do the same. Whatever it is about doctors and such, if I'm not in pain, and if the pain isn't getting worse, I tend to put off my visits and just try to live with it.
Author:  Vindicarre [ Fri Dec 02, 2011 12:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sorry to hear it SG, I'm sure the frustration that it was left untreated despite all logic to the contrary can't make it any easier to deal with for all involved.
Author:  Rynar [ Fri Dec 02, 2011 3:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
I'm so sorry, Squirrel Girl, and will add her and her family to my prayers. It is very sad and unfortunate in this case, but the adage the plumber's house never being plumbed is so often true...
Author:  Jasmy [ Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: "Routine" e-mail from my SiL
I'm so sorry Squirrel Girl...my thoughts are with all of you.

/hugs
Author:  Micheal [ Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:38 pm ]
Post subject: 
Denial runs rampant among homo sapiens.
Author:  Sam [ Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: "Routine" e-mail from my SiL
Killuas wrote:
Sorry to hear this SG. Some people ignore things hoping it will go away or get better on its own and don't want to face reality or are too afraid to face it. While it can be frustrating reminding them that you are there for them and supporting them (and not lecturing them on what could have been) is what they really need now.

I hope it works out OK for her.


+1

My favoritest aunt in the world ignored stomach pain and sickness until it was too late. I was working when she came in for an ultrasound, and they found spots in her liver. She didn't live 2 months past that....... It's extremely hard when someone in the know understands the severity, while the loved one doesn't until it's too late.

Best wishes SG.
Author:  Squirrel Girl [ Sat Dec 03, 2011 1:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: "Routine" e-mail from my SiL
Killuas wrote:
Sorry to hear this SG. Some people ignore things hoping it will go away or get better on its own and don't want to face reality or are too afraid to face it. While it can be frustrating reminding them that you are there for them and supporting them (and not lecturing them on what could have been) is what they really need now.

I hope it works out OK for her.


I e-mailed her back and was very supportive. Did not breathe a word of my frustration. She doesn't need it and what good would it do anyway. Just brought my frustration here to vent.
Author:  Diamondeye [ Sat Dec 03, 2011 5:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: "Routine" e-mail from my SiL
So sorry to hear that SG. :cry:
Author:  Taamar [ Wed Dec 07, 2011 12:20 am ]
Post subject: 
That's so sad. To add a layer of frustration for me is the fact that she obviously has health coverage of some sort, yet she resists using it.
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