Yep - it's part of the package for "having a career" or "having a marriage/relationship." Welcome to the jungle.
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| The truth about speaking https://gladerebooted.net/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=983 |
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| Author: | darksiege [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 8:07 am ] |
| Post subject: | The truth about speaking |
The older I get the more I realize that I am not truly free to speak my mind. There are some things that go through my head that would have consequences I am unwilling to face. This makes me a sad panda |
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| Author: | Lalaas [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 8:45 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Yep - it's part of the package for "having a career" or "having a marriage/relationship." Welcome to the jungle.
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| Author: | Diamondeye [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 9:06 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
darksiege wrote: The older I get the more I realize that I am not truly free to speak my mind. There are some things that go through my head that would have consequences I am unwilling to face. This makes me a sad panda Try to keep in mind how many other peoples' opinions it keeps in check as well. When you think of the amount of bullshit you don't have to listen to, it will seem much better. |
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| Author: | darksiege [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 2:26 pm ] |
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To me though; it feels like lying. And I despise lying. The fact that ot is a requirement does not make it any better |
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| Author: | Micheal [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 4:12 pm ] |
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There are so many things I choose not to say every day it is funny. I'm still free to say it, but I choose not to make matters worse just to say my piece. If it doesn't improve matters, its usually best left unsaid. |
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| Author: | Lydiaa [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 5:51 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
Me too >.< So instead I pretend to say it in my head and I feel better. I've also discovered that people don't appreciate been told the truth, even if it's to their advantage sometimes. They just don't like the hard work that goes with the truth I guess. |
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| Author: | LadyKate [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 6:35 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
darksiege wrote: The older I get the more I realize that I am not truly free to speak my mind. There are some things that go through my head that would have consequences I am unwilling to face. This makes me a sad panda So if there were no consequences, what kinds of things would you be saying? |
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| Author: | darksiege [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 10:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
LadyKate wrote: So if there were no consequences, what kinds of things would you be saying? There are many things, some of which I am not completely comfortable going into detail on... Butit is mainly telling some people what I really think of them. For example - I really want to tell Lisa's friend that I feel like I am a crappy parent, but it dwarfs how bad of a parent I think she is. This is a much more mild one of the bunch, but it still is something I would have to deal with consequences of if I said anything. I have specifically been told that I am NOT allowed to tell her that she must give great head because her voice is so irritating that head is the only way her man could have stayed with her for 3 years. |
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| Author: | Aethien [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 10:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
Diamondeye wrote: darksiege wrote: The older I get the more I realize that I am not truly free to speak my mind. There are some things that go through my head that would have consequences I am unwilling to face. This makes me a sad panda Try to keep in mind how many other peoples' opinions it keeps in check as well. When you think of the amount of bullshit you don't have to listen to, it will seem much better. That's actually a very good point, DE. |
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| Author: | LadyKate [ Sun Nov 29, 2009 10:46 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
darksiege wrote: LadyKate wrote: So if there were no consequences, what kinds of things would you be saying? There are many things, some of which I am not completely comfortable going into detail on... Butit is mainly telling some people what I really think of them. For example - I really want to tell Lisa's friend that I feel like I am a crappy parent, but it dwarfs how bad of a parent I think she is. This is a much more mild one of the bunch, but it still is something I would have to deal with consequences of if I said anything. I have specifically been told that I am NOT allowed to tell her that she must give great head because her voice is so irritating that head is the only way her man could have stayed with her for 3 years. That sounds pretty normal. Generally I have found that telling my husband these private thoughts or my best friend is almost as good as saying them out loud to the intended target. |
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| Author: | Wwen [ Mon Nov 30, 2009 9:03 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
darksiege wrote: There are some things that go through my head that would have consequences I am unwilling to face. This makes me a sad panda Like what? I will usually say anything. Sometimes you have to use the artfully approach to telling someone to **** off though. I can't tell my boss he's a douche, but I can imply it given the opportunity. I think you're being silly. You're completely free to say whatever you like, but you had best be prepared for the consequnces. Sometimes there is great wisdom to be had from not opening your gob. "Better to remain silent and be thought the fool, than to speak and remove all doubt." |
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| Author: | Arathain Kelvar [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 12:38 pm ] |
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Saying everything on your mind isn't very interesting. Nearly everything I say has a point, if it's going to cause drama. Otherwise, it's not worth the drama. If I were a slave to my own thoughts, I wouldn't be free either. I can say whatever I want, if I'm willing to accept the consequences. Freedom is not about being free from the consequences of your choices, it's about having the choices. I'm free to run out into traffic, if you catch my drift. |
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| Author: | Aizle [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 12:45 pm ] |
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Looks at the forums here, especially in hellfire before moderation was put into practice. That's what happens when you speak your mind without any filter. |
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| Author: | darksiege [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 2:45 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: |
Aizle wrote: Looks at the forums here, especially in hellfire before moderation was put into practice. That's what happens when you speak your mind without any filter. The problem there is; the way hellfire was before moderation was not as bad as I want to explode at people sometimes. |
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| Author: | Aizle [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 3:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Re: |
darksiege wrote: Aizle wrote: Looks at the forums here, especially in hellfire before moderation was put into practice. That's what happens when you speak your mind without any filter. The problem there is; the way hellfire was before moderation was not as bad as I want to explode at people sometimes. Let me ask you a question. Do you think that the atmosphere in hellfire was one you'd like to spend a lot of time in? I suspect for many the answer is no. And that would be why having filters and controls on things is a good thing. Because without that, then when you go off on someone, you need to prepared to get punched in the mouth whether figuratively or literally. |
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| Author: | DFK! [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 3:28 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Re: |
Aizle wrote: Because without that, then when you go off on someone, you need to prepared to get punched in the mouth whether figuratively or literally. See, and that's where I disagree with you. |
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| Author: | Aizle [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 3:57 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Re: |
DFK! wrote: Aizle wrote: Because without that, then when you go off on someone, you need to prepared to get punched in the mouth whether figuratively or literally. See, and that's where I disagree with you. Disagree how? I'm not saying that someone should punch people for saying anything, but surely you understand that if you go too far with verbal comments, you may very well have a fight on your hands. Hell, if I recall correctly, Khross took a chair to someone for verbal comments that were made toward him/around him. |
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| Author: | DFK! [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 4:02 pm ] |
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Your position appeared to me to say that violence in response to words was justified. It was to that apparent stance I posted disagreement. |
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| Author: | Aizle [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 4:37 pm ] |
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Ah. Not what I'm suggesting, just noting that reality does have people who will react that way. |
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| Author: | Khross [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 4:49 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
Sometimes violence is the solution. Curious thing about humanity: it likes to forget that its composed of animals. |
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| Author: | Aizle [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 5:08 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
Khross wrote: Sometimes violence is the solution. I don't disagree, sometimes violence is the solution. Khross wrote: Curious thing about humanity: it likes to forget that its composed of animals. I prefer to view it as humanity is trying to rise above it's origins and strives to be more/better than animals. |
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| Author: | Imperi [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 7:02 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I usually speak my mind. This leads me to not thinking inappropriate things, because there would be a high chance of speaking them and getting myself in trouble. Speaking your mind conditions your brain into having just one personality. |
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| Author: | darksiege [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 7:28 pm ] |
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somehow I think the original message to what I said is now lost. I know I am very free to say these things, and I should also expect to get my *** kicked if I say some of these things, or to lose friends, etc. if I actually say some of these things. This in effect curbs my voice, and tells me what I cannot say. Or else I will need to endure the consequences. I dislike that, that is all I was saying. And that sometimes I think my mental woes would disappear if I could just cut loose every now and then. But the consequences for cutting loose are things I am not willing to endure, so I stay silent. |
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| Author: | Imperi [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 7:32 pm ] |
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This is a really tough problem. I am often scared of what would happen if I stopped speaking my mind... if I would have a split personality where one is in my head and one spoken. This is why I try to be as open as possible when I communicate. Often there are stray thoughts in my head that I can't speak, but usually not enough to give me anxiety. |
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| Author: | Wwen [ Tue Dec 01, 2009 8:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The truth about speaking |
Khross wrote: Sometimes violence is the solution. Curious thing about humanity: it likes to forget that its composed of animals. Violence isn't the answer. Violence is the question. "Yes" is the answer. |
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