The Glade 4.0

More posts like this, please.

scorpion kitten. It was a furry purring scorpion/cat that jumped up on my leg purring, locked on with its furry pincers and stung me until I was awake.

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"Life isn't divided into genres. It's a horrifying, romantic, tragic, comical, science-fiction cowboy detective novel. You know, with a bit of pornography if you're lucky."
— Alan Moore

Eureka much?

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“The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration.” - Pearl S. Buck

Hrm?

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"...but there exists also in the human heart a depraved taste for equality, which impels the weak to attempt to lower the powerful to their own level and reduces men to prefer equality in slavery to inequality with freedom." - De Tocqueville

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Holy shitsnacks!

I've seen the show, I just don't understand the comment of it in the context.

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"...but there exists also in the human heart a depraved taste for equality, which impels the weak to attempt to lower the powerful to their own level and reduces men to prefer equality in slavery to inequality with freedom." - De Tocqueville

I love the show. Your dream reminded me of Jack Carter & the brainiacs.

It was a compliment. =)

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“The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration.” - Pearl S. Buck

Yay!

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"...but there exists also in the human heart a depraved taste for equality, which impels the weak to attempt to lower the powerful to their own level and reduces men to prefer equality in slavery to inequality with freedom." - De Tocqueville

I don't usually lucid dream these days. Normally I am content to just be a passive observer to my dreams events. Usually I know I'm in a dream state and generally don't fear death because of it (I've been shot, stabbed, drowned, dismembered, electrocuted, tons of other things....). But thanks to this thread you guys forced me to go lucid again. Here's what happened.

Apparently I was some rich guy who owned many acres of land. But the crew working on my next big expensive project was secretly a cult who agreed to do the job because there was an ancient temple buried on my land and they were working hard to unearth it's power.

The head cultist, who looked exactly like the main guy who imprisoned Downey Jr. in Iron Man, had quite a lot of the temple opened up for moving around in. I stealthily tailed him once I found out what they were up to. I was caught, and I was defeated via their skills with hand-to-hand combat. Instead of being taken prisoner or killed, they just threw me outside like you'd see happen in Old West saloons.

I was with a coworker, and I told him, "This would be so much easier if I was a monk." And then immediately I realized, "Hey! Wait a minute. I can be whatever the hell I want! This guy is toast!" And from there, I went back inside with renewed vigor.

The first thug I came upon I did a flying leap kick from about 50 feet away, slamming into him and knocking him into his other thug buddies. There were about half a dozen total and they tried to swarm me. With kicks, punches, and flips all defying the laws of physics, they couldn't do jack squat. And, in cinematic cliche as I stood there amidst all the prone thugs on every side of me, a new group of a dozen or so stormed into the room and surrounded me. And, in more cliche, I just kind of did a standard karate pose and thought, "Bring it on."

And then unfortunately my alarm for work went off.

Smacking my own brain around and forcing it to defy the laws of physics is something I learned to do a long time ago. I don't know about other people, but my dreams are pretty good simulations of the real world. Gravity makes you fall. Hitting solid objects with your bare hands hurts. Stuff like that. The best way I can describe overcoming that is how it was explained in the first Matrix movie. Keanu tried to convince himself he wasn't going to fall, but deep down, he still knew he would. Once you dominate and make that part of your brain your own *****, that is when dreams can get really fun.

I remember having several Hulk dreams years ago and tried punching through a wall of solid concrete. My hand bounced painfully off the wall, as you would expect in real life. I just got angry and defied what I knew wasn't real. The wall blew apart into tiny bits.

Because of that, when I was the monk in last night's dream, I was thinking to myself while fighting, "I am not doing enough damage. I should be shattering bones with each blow." So I was gearing up to defy even more dream physics. But, again and unfortunately, I woke up to go to work.

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Les Zombis et les Loups-Garous!

Had one I remember, finally.

Dream starts in an old cargo plane, ramp descending from the back. Some guy with full bird Colonel insignia tells me its time. I'm fit, I'm probably in my early 30s, dressed in a dark grey jump suit, no parachute. I unbuckle from my seat, stand and rush out the back of the plane down the ramp.

The jump suit has gliding panels from the arms to the legs. I use these to maneuver toward a dark shape below the clouds I am approaching. I enter the clouds, things get misty and foggy for a minute, then I emerge into a strong rain with some wind. A few hundred feet below and a little in front of me is a dirigible, there are gunners fore and aft, but I am above the sight lines of the one I am closest to. I unsheath two swords as I land directly behind him on a catwalk. He starts to turn. I strike and his head goes flying off then starts its descent to ground. I sheath the swords, man the gun and turn it to take out the man on the other end of the catwalk. He is still oblivious as he pays attention to his field of responsibility and shields his face from the rain. I squeeze the trigger and a quick three shot burst ends his surveillance and his life. I can barely hear the shots over the storm.

I move to the center of the dirigible's top and find a hatch. It opens easily, and I let myself inside. There is a ladder to the next catwalk about 50 feet below. There is no one on the catwalk. I climb down the ladder.

The catwalk is just above the equator of a dozen large gas balloons. I go to the rear end of the catwalk and find five parachutes. I disable all of them, opening the containers so the silk falls on the floor.

There is a communication station by the parachutes. A voice in a language i do not understand starts speaking. The tone is urgent. I say nothing, do nothing to the communicator. The voice stops. I hear a click. I unsheath the swords again.I extend them on a 45 degree down angle over both sides of the catwalk, piercing the first bag on each side. I run the length of the catwalk, opening all the bags beyond hope of repair. I sheath the swords again.

I reach the other side and the air is getting hard to breathe from the new mix with the helium mixing with the air. Oxygen is now a small part of the mix. I reach the far wall and open it to the atmosphere, giving myself an escape route. As I feel myself sucked back into the storm I feel a shot fly by me. I see a very large man pulled out of the same hole I had just exited the dirigible through. He has a pistol in his left hand.

I'm falling. Once more I open up into the flying squirrel position and look around. The bag of the dirigible has detached from the flight deck. The bag is rapidly deflating and quickly streaming into the distance. The roof of the flight deck splits down the middle, turns 90 degrees and becomes a wing.

The flight deck has become a glider. I maintain my altitude and maneuver back towards the glider. I once more arm myself with the swords, land on a fabric roof and slice parts of it into several pieces, the wind continues to shred the fabric. A large Nordic looking soldier, probably the Captain of the Dirigible, pulls a gun and fires, I duck to the left wing and start shredding the fabric covering the wing.

The Captain jumps up top and fires at me again, I try to duck but he hits me in the leg. He loses balance after the shot and falls from the glider. I scream, I fall off the plane and barely manage to get my descent under control using the flying squirrel wings. I see three people falling from the glider as it breaks apart on its way down. I believe I have accomplished my mission. I sigh. I land in a tree and am knocked unconscious, or killed, who knows, I wake up at this point.

Most vivid dream I've had in years.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

Wow, that is a freaking awesome dream. Intense.

Eat pizza just before bed. It helps ramp things up.

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Raell Kromwell

Dredging up an old thread (it's only a month old!)

Participate in bowling tournament with old high school friends
Arrive, confused, teased
Tournament about to start, no bowling shoes
Me and girl (don't recognize) try to get bowling shoes
Sent to storm drain outside, told to get shoes
DISGUSTING mud/**** tunnel
Randomly had flashlight in pocket today, lucky!
Find huge cavern, captured by natives(?)
Given weird gold glowby bowling shoes, embarrassed to wear them
Girl given regular shoes
Somehow flying through the air (launched?), end up landing in the middle of town
Land near guy I know (don't remember who), embarrassed to be seen, run off to bowling alley
Arrive at bowling alley, yelled at by old high school friends for being late
(Woke up)

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Did you watch a Harry Potter movie and then Kingpin right before bed while eating a large pizza?

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

The bowling thing I can guess is based on talking to my friend about his participation in a charity bowling tournament recently. The old high school friends thing is probably because of Facebook. The tunnel, natives (they were more like morlocks), and magic bowling shoes, I have no idea.

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I was thinking maybe the shoes indicated that you were chosen for something important (the chosen one?) because they were gold.
Sounds like an interesting dream at any rate.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Had a really weird dream a few nights ago! Or at least a dream with weird side effects...

I first remember being in a cave with this girl, and we were going diving in the cave. Everything had a warm sort of light to it, and the water was crystal clear, so it was visually pretty impressive (as was the girl!) But apparently I didn't have any sort of diving equipment. She was some sort of instructor or guide or something, and we were going to hop in, swim straight down, then forward to another vertical passage to where there's more air. But every time I'd try it, I'd lose sight of her and didn't know where to go, so I'd always retreat back to where I started as I ran out of breath.

Then tiger sharks appeared. In the cave. But it was cool cause they were docile. We called off the diving to come back another day. Then we flashforwarded to that other day, and a guy was with us now. The sharks were back but we ignored them. I still, however, couldn't make the dive properly. I'm pretty sure I was expected to have some sort of SCUBA gear! I made some headway in at least figuring out where I was supposed to go, but alas, the dream ended and I never made it.

The weird side effects part? I'd keep waking up from the dream holding my breath. :p I remember being annoyed by this, because it's not fun waking up entirely out of breath, but I'd immediately drift back off into the same dream.

This is probably how people get sleep apnea!

The other weird part is that despite repeatedly apparently drowning, and despite sharks, the whole dream had a pretty light and fun mood to it. Quite incongruous, but given the subject matter (cave divers are nuts!), that could've easily been nightmare material so I'm glad for it.

I dreamed that I could access my cat's "properties" via VBA ...

If only!

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Go back to zero, take a pill, and get well ~ Lemmy Kilmister

Halfling porn...

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Raell Kromwell

Wrong language. I'm pretty sure you're looking for this.

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Sail forth! steer for the deep waters only!
Reckless, O soul, exploring, I with thee, and thou with me;
For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.

I'd seriously consider putting a Litterbox required for waste elimination routine in there.

Cross pollinating threads, but its meant to be funny.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

This thread is a blast from the past.

So here we go. I'm sitting in the lobby of one of our engineering buildings, when one of the chemical engineers (6' tall redhead gal) comes up to me and drops two plaid handkerchiefs on the table. She proceeds to tell me that she's just picked up some female condoms that she wants to test out, and I'm coming over to her place tonight. Her bedroom is on the second floor balcony of the theater. While we're ****, the British invade, and this leads to my involvement in the American Revolutionary War.

This all made sense at the time.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.

I was in the mall and I couldn't find the gaming store. And strangers kept asking me for money.

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I prefer to think of them as "Fighting evil in another dimension"

Indeed. I accuse you of witchcraft, specifically thread-necromancy: the unnatural raising of threads long dead and giving them false life, dooming them to roam the boards, in a futile search for actual brains.

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Well Ali Baba had them forty thieves, Scheherezade had a thousand tales
But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves you got a brand of magic never fails...
...Mister Aladdin, sir, What will your pleasure be?
Let me take your order, Jot it down -You ain't never had a friend like me
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Are you saying Coro is a Forum Anthropomancer?

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