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 Post subject: Ahhh! Kill it!
PostPosted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 7:22 am 
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The Dancing Cat
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http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/38320429/ns/us_news/
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Spider-infested ship turned away from port
Thousands spill out as cargo is unloaded; vessel last docked in South Korea


HAGATNA, Guam — Authorities in the U.S. territory of Guam have turned away a ship after thousands of spiders overflowed from its cargo.

The Guam Department of Agriculture says hundreds of large spiders and thousands of smaller ones were seen when stevedores began offloading insulation and beams for housing units from the ship, the M.V. Altavia.

The cargo was returned to the ship, and the Agriculture Department on Friday ordered that the ship not be allowed to dock. It was last ported in South Korea.

Agriculture officials say they don't know what type of spiders were on the ship, but said it's a type that isn't normally found on the island. They said there was concern the spiders could damage Guam's environment.

The ship was carrying housing units and accessories for a work force village expected to house up to 18,000 temporary workers.


They should have authorized nuclear strikes.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 7:40 am 
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Take off and nuke the site from orbit. Its the only way to be sure.


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 Post subject: Re: Ahhh! Kill it!
PostPosted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:52 am 
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:59 am 
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In other news, Syfy channel has sued Guam for damages over delays caused during their filming of their next made for TV movie.


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 Post subject: Re: Ahhh! Kill it!
PostPosted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 12:09 pm 
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Spiders suck, can you imagine being crew on that ship? At least it wasnt coming from Australia with a load of killer spiders....


:shock:


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 3:51 pm 
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Wish there was some scale in that picture. That does not look like a cute cuddly little spider.

They apparently already have quite a problem with invasive species, according to Wikipedia.

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 Post subject: Re: Ahhh! Kill it!
PostPosted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 10:44 pm 
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There is no such thing as a cute and cuddly spider!!! :shock:

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 Post subject: Re: Ahhh! Kill it!
PostPosted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 11:04 pm 
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 12:20 am 
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Omg...my worst nightmare would ever!

/shiver I hate spiders!!

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 3:38 am 
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Dude, a spider bit me on the ear a few weeks ago. ON THE **** EAR. Then it started to spread... My truce with spiders is over.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 7:29 am 
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You sure it was just a bite, and not the spider inserting its egg case under the surface of your skin to provide food when the spider-lings hatch?


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 11:06 am 
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I would like to propose an indefinite moratorium on any proposed scenarios where spiderlings burst from people's ears.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 11:07 am 
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shuyung wrote:
I would like to propose an indefinite moratorium on any proposed scenarios where spiderlings burst from people's ears.

And...fixed.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 11:38 am 
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Also, speaking of spiderlings...
Spoiler:
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 1:44 pm 
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 1:35 am 
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I kill spiders in the most spectacular method I happen to have on hand at the moment of any given encounter.

I have stabbed a spider with a rapier. I have cut a spider in half with a blade. I have breathed fire on a spider. I have killed a spider with a thrown shuriken. My roomate and I endured a summer of spider infestation at our apartment complex by inventing our own suped-up Nerf gun spider hunting drinking game (which, by the way, was responsible for the shuriken kill).

Yes, these were big, hairy ****. But the little ones die just as harshly. **** those **** spiders right in their dozens of evil, spider eyes.

My most recent kill was a stick and boot combination on my way to fighter practice this evening. The soul sucking little bastard had made a home in my rear view mirror. I lamented a less practical kill, but the classics never get old.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 2:11 am 
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shuyung wrote:
I would like to propose an indefinite moratorium on any proposed scenarios where spiderlings burst from people's ears.


I would like to second this post.

Additionally, my last encounter with spiders involved me trying to squish it and it bench pressing the shoe I threw at it....

no love for the arachnids.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 8:38 am 
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I'm only KOS to black widows and brown recluses. Other spiders are fine. They stay out of my way and out of my stuff and they can occupy whatever corner they want. I think of them as pest control.

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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 9:44 am 
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Monte wrote:
I kill spiders in the most spectacular method I happen to have on hand at the moment of any given encounter.

I have stabbed a spider with a rapier. I have cut a spider in half with a blade. I have breathed fire on a spider. I have killed a spider with a thrown shuriken. My roomate and I endured a summer of spider infestation at our apartment complex by inventing our own suped-up Nerf gun spider hunting drinking game (which, by the way, was responsible for the shuriken kill).

Yes, these were big, hairy ****. But the little ones die just as harshly. **** those **** spiders right in their dozens of evil, spider eyes.

My most recent kill was a stick and boot combination on my way to fighter practice this evening. The soul sucking little bastard had made a home in my rear view mirror. I lamented a less practical kill, but the classics never get old.


Oh my goodness, Monte, ROFL oh the mental pictures your imagery creates!! :lol:
That's awesome.

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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 11:23 am 
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Screeling wrote:
I'm only KOS to black widows and brown recluses. Other spiders are fine. They stay out of my way and out of my stuff and they can occupy whatever corner they want. I think of them as pest control.



^^
This.

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 Post subject: Re: Re:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 11:43 am 
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Squirrel Girl wrote:
Screeling wrote:
I'm only KOS to black widows and brown recluses. Other spiders are fine. They stay out of my way and out of my stuff and they can occupy whatever corner they want. I think of them as pest control.



^^
This.

Outside spiders are free to do as they will. Trespassers however will be squished by the almighty hand of justice swathed in the paper towel of righteousness.

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 Post subject: Re: Ahhh! Kill it!
PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 12:18 pm 
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Pholcus spiders are the only spiders that are not brutally and ruthlessly eradicated on sight. I'm not sure why, exactly, but they don't trigger my arachnophobia at all. It likely has something to do with the 100ish year old house in the woods and never being able to get rid of them for any length of time... a time measured in days. On one hand.

Spoiler:
Image

That one is a pretty big one, even. More pics towards the bottom of http://tenczar.net/midwest/DP/DP.htm


Stealing a quote from the website I got that picture from:

Quote:
Pholcus phalangioides (Pholcidae) is the long-bodied cellar spider. These docile and harmless spiders occur both inside and outside of buildings, but are especially common in basements and corners. I find them on the ceiling corners in my house, and less often, near the floor, close to Steatoda triangulosa. P. phalangioides hang upside-down in their cobweb-like webs and vibrate when disturbed. They are welcomed residents that feed on insects and use their long legs to wrap prey with speed and precision. These helpful housemates can be a bit untidy at times, but their webs can be gently swept or dusted to remove insect debris. The spiders will build new webs shortly. To avoid vacuuming these beneficial spiders, sweep rather than vacuum the webs. Females are 7 to 8 mm, males are 5 to 6 mm, and legspans are 35 to 50 mm.


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 Post subject: Re: Re:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 12:41 pm 
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Squirrel Girl wrote:
Screeling wrote:
I'm only KOS to black widows and brown recluses. Other spiders are fine. They stay out of my way and out of my stuff and they can occupy whatever corner they want. I think of them as pest control.



^^
This.

Double-this. :D

And, given that we don't really have brown recluses in California, it's just Black Widows. But, we have enough of those that I get to kill one every couple of months, usually in some hidden spot that I was just about to put my hand in.

I will usually give other indoor spiders the benefit of relocation to the outdoors, should they choose to accept it. If not and it gets messy, I'll squish 'em. But it's not my first choice.

Pholcids are cool, kind of neurotic, actually. Touch the web and they spaz out. I love it.

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 Post subject: Re: Ahhh! Kill it!
PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:23 pm 
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We don't see a lot of spiders around our house to be honest. I do have a great spider story though.

Few years back, I was watching Steve Irwin and he was going on about spiders and other insects. Talked about where they like to lay their eggs, hide and all that. He made mention that they like to crawl inside of shoes and that's how a lot of people get bitten. Well move forward to the very next day and I'm going out to mow the yard. I had this old pair of indoor soccer shoes that I used to cut the grass and I kept them outside. They are pretty worn so all I have to do is slip my feet into them. I had my right foot poised right above the shoe and was about to slide my foot in it when ole Steve's warning popped into my head. I put my foot down, picked up the shoe and shook it out. And wouldn't you know it, a black widow fell right out. I squashed that sucker and banged the crap out of my shoes for the next 10 minutes.

Thanks for saving me a world of pain Steve! Miss you!!

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:28 pm 
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/shudder

Lewis Grizzard wrote that for people who are scared of snakes, there's only one kind of snake: the copper-headed water rattler. And for those ophiophobes, all snakes are classified as such. That's pretty much how I feel about spiders. There is no such thing as a different "species" of spider...all spiders are black-brown reclusive widows. The idea that there are non-poisonous, non-harmful spiders is absolute bunk, propaganda from the pro-spider movement (whose members most likely ally themselves with the spiders involuntarily, due to the presence of mind-controlling spider eggs in one's brain).


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