Disclaimer: The following was truly written as a rant. Thoughts just kept spilling out of my head and through my fingers. So apologies in advance for a crappily written, long winded venting session.
So, I have a job. Through a staffing company and a 6 month contract (I think)
It's so much better than what I have been doing to this point in my life. I used to work in a call center help desk which, over the course of 4.5 years, I burned out on. This led to a crisis of sorts in my life, which in turn led to me being unemployed for appx. 8 months while I stayed at home with my 1 year old.
So now I am working again. I finally have a position where I am not a call center slave. I am part of a smallish IT group in a building with about 200 users and we support some of the field people. I am hands on everything now. No more password resets, no more mind numbing drudgery of the phone constantly ringing all day every day. I am getting experience with deskside support. Printer installs, PC builds, creating user accounts in AD, we do it all and have many rights that, as a HD slave, I never had.
OK, I know I sound silly and some of you here have been doing this and much more for likely more years that I have. The point to take away here is that it is finally a step away from what I hated so much in my previous job and I am almost enjoying being "The IT guy"
All of that being said, I have the "Contractor" cloud hanging over me. The week I started was exactly one week before the big corporate HQ move and, in fact, I believe that myself and the other contractor were hired for exactly that. He was here for only 3 weeks before me and we both do the same thing. What I haven't been able to figure out in the one month I have been here is if the position(s) we have will maintain for any length of time. Additionally, I believe the possibility is that only one (if either) of these positions will remain. If that is the case, only one of us two contractors will be offered a job.
So I am happy doing a job where I feel I am learning and, should it not last, I will take away valuable experience that I will use moving on to the next position. No more Helpdesk for Foamy, hopefully more deskside support. More "Yes, I have experience with that" answers on future interviews. More opportunities that are good for my future and career.
But, it constantly weighs on me. Always wondering when, how, or if this current assignment will end. With one child, another one planned in the next year or so, and the desire to move into a new house all on the horizon it sure makes looking to the future difficult. Granted I am not unhappy, just always pensive and I want to feel comfortable in my life for once, not always wondering what the future will hold.
I love my wife and son and I am getting to a point where I am rightly happy with my own self. Also for what it's worth, I apologize to those of you who have gone or are going through so much worse than what I described above. I just needed to blather on about this as it is always on my mind.
Thanks as always for listening (well, reading)
_________________ This must be Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.
|