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 Post subject: Dog and Cat's Diary
PostPosted: Thu Mar 10, 2011 7:26 pm 
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Asian Blonde

Joined: Mon Sep 21, 2009 7:14 pm
Posts: 2075
Something cute I got today and just wanted to share.

A Dog's Diary
Spoiler:
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


A Cat's Diary
Spoiler:
Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of ‘allergies'. I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now... Will keep you posted.


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 Post subject: Re: Dog and Cat's Diary
PostPosted: Thu Mar 10, 2011 7:30 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 24, 2009 4:57 am
Posts: 849
:D

Too true...


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 Post subject: Re: Dog and Cat's Diary
PostPosted: Thu Mar 10, 2011 8:15 pm 
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Joined: Thu Feb 04, 2010 2:08 am
Posts: 906
Noggel wrote:
:D

Too true...


You've obviously never met a chihuahua. (in before some snide remarks that this is not, in fact, a dog) :P


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 Post subject: Re: Dog and Cat's Diary
PostPosted: Thu Mar 10, 2011 11:06 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 24, 2009 4:57 am
Posts: 849
They're not, in fa-- gah!


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 Post subject: Re: Dog and Cat's Diary
PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 8:58 am 
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Lucky Bastard
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Joined: Fri Sep 04, 2009 6:11 am
Posts: 2341
Lyd:

Saw this before. Was funny then, and it is still funny this time.

Thanks!

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This must be Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.


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 Post subject: Re: Dog and Cat's Diary
PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 8:59 am 
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The Reason
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Posts: 859
Yeah, This is a cute one. My mother sent this to me in an e-mail because it describes my one cat Lacey perfectly. My other cat Sully is more like the Dog

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