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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 10:20 am 
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A woman whose pregnancy ran into complications was legally prohibited from getting an abortion because she was at 22 weeks, even though there was virtually no chance of the baby surviving anyway. Seems wrong to me, and it's a very moving article, so figured I'd post it here as food for thought. Apologies in advance to anyone who finds it upsetting though. Spoilered the article's opening paragraphs, and perfectly willing to take this down if requested.

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Danielle Deaver cradled her daughter, knowing the newborn's gasps would slowly subside, and the baby would die....Her baby had virtually no chance of survival. And if she lived, she would be severely disabled....That fear - that the baby would suffer before its predestined death - compelled the couple to seek an abortion. But a new Nebraska law that limits abortion after the 20th week of gestation prevented her from getting one.

At 3:15 p.m. Dec. 8, 1-pound, 10-ounce Elizabeth Deaver - named in memory of Robb's grandmother - made one final attempt to breathe. Her life struggle, 15 minutes outside the womb after 23 weeks and five days of gestation, was over.

"Our hands were tied," Danielle Deaver said. "The outcome of my pregnancy, that choice was made by God. I feel like how to handle the end of my pregnancy, that choice should have been mine, and it wasn't because of a law."

Like I said, this just seems wrong. I'm all for limiting "convenience abortions" after a certain developmental stage, but in situations where the child is very likely to die or be severely disabled, it should absolutely be up to the parents to decide what's best. I'd analogize it to pulling the plug on a life support machine or deciding on euthanasia for a person who is terminally ill and unable to act on their own behalf.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 10:24 am 
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Sorry, not a big fan of euthanasia.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 10:26 am 
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Khross wrote:
Sorry, not a big fan of euthanasia.

Really? Even in situations where it's consciously chosen by the patient?


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 10:28 am 
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There's a difference between euthanasia and suicide. I'll leave you to figure it out ...

By the way, I have no sympathy for the woman mentioned in your article. In fact, I think she's nothing short of monstrous.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 10:35 am 
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Khross wrote:
There's a difference between euthanasia and suicide. I'll leave you to figure it out ...

Ah, well I don't believe there's a clear distinction between the two, as the term "euthanasia" generally includes certain types of suicide. That said, I see the distinction you're making, and that seems more in line with what I would have expected your position to be.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 10:54 am 
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Her baby had virtually no chance of survival. And if she lived, she would be severely disabled.

This is where I find it gets into trouble. I don't think it's her right to decide what quality of life is acceptable.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 11:09 am 
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Screeling wrote:
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Her baby had virtually no chance of survival. And if she lived, she would be severely disabled.

This is where I find it gets into trouble. I don't think it's her right to decide what quality of life is acceptable.

Aye, I'm a bit torn on that issue myself, but I think quality of life is a legitimate factor in the decision. I'm just not sure where to draw the line.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 11:29 am 
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"Our hands were tied," Danielle Deaver said. "The outcome of my pregnancy, that choice was made by God. I feel like how to handle the end of my pregnancy, that choice should have been mine, and it wasn't because of a law."


Well now that is a fascinating contradiction. If it was God's decision, why not leave it in his hands? God decided my child would die but I should have been allowed to take the timeframe out of his hands... Perhaps I'd feel differently if she hadn't invoked him but I feel like this person is a hypocrite.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 11:40 am 
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This would have been a convenience abortion. The convenience of not having to watch or care for a dying child, and the convenience of not having to care for a disabled child if she lived.

I admit I am moved, but not in the direction I think you expected. I'm saddened by not only the loss of the baby but the "outrage" her parents feel by her being given a chance.

I'm disgusted by the parents.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 11:56 am 
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Screeling wrote:
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Her baby had virtually no chance of survival. And if she lived, she would be severely disabled.

This is where I find it gets into trouble. I don't think it's her right to decide what quality of life is acceptable.


Exactly. But then again, I roll with people that carry any living baby to term. Even if all the child knows is two and half minutes of her parent's love before she dies.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:02 pm 
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I'm fascinated by the difference between your (collective) reactions and mine.

I read this:
Quote:
"The outcome of my pregnancy, that choice was made by God. I feel like how to handle the end of my pregnancy, that choice should have been mine, and it wasn't because of a law."

and I hear a person of faith accepting the near-inevitability of her child's death but wanting to mitigate the suffering involved. Hopwin reads it and hears hypocrisy.

I read this:
Quote:
Without amniotic fluid around the fetus, the infant would likely be born with contractures, a shortening of muscle tissue that causes an inability to move limbs. Because the skull of the fetus was still soft, the muscles in the mother's uterus would likely cause deformities to its face and head. It also was unlikely the baby's lungs would develop beyond the 22-week stage, when Danielle's water broke.

...They asked the perinatologist a question no parent wants to ask: At what point do parents who are willing to do anything to save a child turn selfish by putting the child through what seemed to them like torture? There was less than a 10 percent chance their child would have a heartbeat and be able to breathe on its own. There was an even smaller chance - estimated at 2 percent - that the baby would ultimately be able to perform the most basic functions on its own, such as eating.

and I think it was a horrific situation in which the parents had to choose between a quick, clean death for their child or a 90% chance of a painful death or, in the unlikely event that was avoided, a 98% chance of a life of severe disability and dependency. Arathain reads it and thinks it was a choice of convenience.

Not necessarily saying y'all are wrong, but wow, talk about different perspectives!


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:11 pm 
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It's pathetic to me that people aren't willing to afford our own species the same courtesy that we provide to dogs.

If you found a dog in anything close to similar a situation that this child was going to be in, most anyone would provide it a mercy killing to put it out of it's misery.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:25 pm 
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Aizle wrote:
It's pathetic to me that people aren't willing to afford our own species the same courtesy that we provide to dogs.

If you found a dog in anything close to similar a situation that this child was going to be in, most anyone would provide it a mercy killing to put it out of it's misery.



I think it's pretty pathetic you see a dog and a child as the same. I think you are and your ilk are the ones with the issues.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:28 pm 
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Not what I said, but I wasn't expecting you to be able to understand what I said anyway.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:30 pm 
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Aizle wrote:
Not what I said, but I wasn't expecting you to be able to understand what I said anyway.



**** you you stupid piece of ****. **** baby killer. I hope your stupid *** never has kids, would be the worst thing for that child.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:32 pm 
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Since when is eugenic euthanasia a courtesy?

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:33 pm 
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RangerDave wrote:
Arathain reads it and thinks it was a choice of convenience.


Even if it is a mercy call, which I am willing to believe (giving the parents the benefit of the doubt), it's still a choice of convenience. It's certainly not necessary, it is mercy. A choice of convenience for the child, if not for the parents.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:33 pm 
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Nitefox wrote:
Aizle wrote:
Not what I said, but I wasn't expecting you to be able to understand what I said anyway.



**** you you stupid piece of ****. **** baby killer. I hope your stupid *** never has kids, would be the worst thing for that child.


Dude, learn how to handle disagreement. WTF.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:36 pm 
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Khross wrote:
Since when is eugenic euthanasia a courtesy?

That depends on who you think the courtesy applies to, Khross.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:40 pm 
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Considering Nitefox has recently lost two children to similar complications, I'd say the only person being totally disrespectful here is Aizle. It seems to me that despite the difficulty of the decision, Nitefox and LadyKate arrived at the most humane and appropriate conclusion possible: they could no longer attempt to have children. I can't even pretend to understand the pain and gravity of that decision. Yet, we have the woman mentioned in the original post ...

The fact that the woman mentioned in the original post miscarried 4 times prior over the same complication that ultimately ended this child's life indicates that she is biologically incapable of producing a healthy baby. It was the height of selfishness and arrogance to assume she could have a child successfully; and it is the height of monstrosity to abort a child that may or may not survive and may or may not suffer from debilitating conditions due to one's own inability to reproduce.

Beyond that, we have Aizle talking about abortion as a mercy killing the same as it is for an already dying dog? Far be it for me to suggest anything is beyond the pale, but I'm fairly certain Aizle just rocket jumped past the point of propriety.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:42 pm 
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Khross wrote:
Since when is eugenic euthanasia a courtesy?


It isn't, but this isn't really about eugenics, it's really a quality of life issue.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:44 pm 
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Aizle wrote:
Khross wrote:
Since when is eugenic euthanasia a courtesy?
It isn't, but this isn't really about eugenics, it's really a quality of life issue.
No, it's about eugenics. You're advocating the abortion of a potentially non-viable fetus because of some indeterminate loss of "quality of life." That's about as **** subjective and disgusting as anything I can possibly imagine. Abortion wouldn't have been a mercy killing; it was an option of financial convenience for a set of parents who weren't ready to handle the consequences of their actions.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:51 pm 
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While obviously the exact result is not possible, there seems to have been a lot of statistical hard data for the family to go on, that no only would the child not survive, but it would be a significant struggle with a high likelihood of pain. I don't see how attempting to avoid that is a bad thing.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:51 pm 
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Khross wrote:
Beyond that, we have Aizle talking about abortion as a mercy killing the same as it is for an already dying dog? Far be it for me to suggest anything is beyond the pale, but I'm fairly certain Aizle just rocket jumped past the point of propriety.


Meh, whatever. I can certainly understand his sensitivity on the subject, and I can see how it would elicit such a response. However, that's not Aizle's problem. If Nitefox is too sensitive to rationally discuss opposing viewpoints, he shouldn't click on the thread.

Personal issues are no excuse for muzzling opposing viewpoints, no matter what they are. To my knowledge Aizle and Nitefox do not know each other personally, so personal sensitivities should not come into play.

Be able to take it, or don't involve yourself. Nobody can blame him for not wanting to be involved.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:54 pm 
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Khross wrote:
Considering Nitefox has recently lost two children to similar complications, I'd say the only person being totally disrespectful here is Aizle. It seems to me that despite the difficulty of the decision, Nitefox and LadyKate arrived at the most humane and appropriate conclusion possible: they could no longer attempt to have children. I can't even pretend to understand the pain and gravity of that decision. Yet, we have the woman mentioned in the original post ...

The fact that the woman mentioned in the original post miscarried 4 times prior over the same complication that ultimately ended this child's life indicates that she is biologically incapable of producing a healthy baby. It was the height of selfishness and arrogance to assume she could have a child successfully; and it is the height of monstrosity to abort a child that may or may not survive and may or may not suffer from debilitating conditions due to one's own inability to reproduce.

Beyond that, we have Aizle talking about abortion as a mercy killing the same as it is for an already dying dog? Far be it for me to suggest anything is beyond the pale, but I'm fairly certain Aizle just rocket jumped past the point of propriety.


My understand is that LK and Nitefox's situation was nothing remotely close to this. Both their loses were unexpected and sudden. So my comments are in no way directed at them.


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