The Glade 4.0

....that life is not fair. I always heard that growing up, every time I was upset about something and cried, "But that's not fair!" and the response I got was always along the lines of, "Life is not fair."
Some of those old cliches go in one ear and out the other but once you become an adult and experience things for yourself, you begin to see why some of these sayings have been around for so long. They really mean something. Life is not fair. The good guy doesn't always win, bad tings DO happen to good people, there are people that are going to dislike you for no good reason no matter how hard you try, and there are people that you cannot talk out of being mean and the Golden rule doesn't work...you're going to have to defend yourself verbally and sometimes physically.
On a related, and unrelated note, I find it funny that we spend our entire childhood being told to obey without question and then as adults we are taught to question everything and think for ourselves. I'm still trying to come up with a good answer for that one...hopefully I'm able to learn that one and pass on the answer before I die.

What are some of the things you have learned (or finally come to understand from what your parents told you) that you'd like to pass on? What are some of the life lessons that you are still learning and/or struggling with?

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

I think we should teach that though life isn't fair, it doesn't mean it isn't something to strive for.

Lesson 1: Kharma isn't real. What is real is that bad people tend to cluster together because, in the long-run, no one else wants to be around them resulting in bad things happening. On the flip-side if you want good in your life, be a good person and in turn people will be drawn to you, then (and here's the tricky part) if you can learn to tell the good people from the bad people good things will come your way.

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I think you made your own point, LK. You were told that life wasn't fair plenty of times, but never really believed it until it happened. Unfortunately, some things can't be taught verbally, you just have to experience them for yourself.

The alternative would be if you started treating your kid unfairly all the time, but that seems kind of extreme.

I don't believe that life is based on fair or unfair. I believe it to be based on choice.

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"None is more important, none more legitimate, than that of rendering the people safe as they are the
ultimate guardians of their own liberty."- Thomas Jefferson

"Yeah, I'm rehearsing my poker face. I don't handle stupid well. *sigh*" - Farsky

I want any children I have to learn to be a person that is confident and happy with themself and with what is inside. I want them to have values of kindness and compassion. I think these are building blocks and good comes from these traits.

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Dream as if you'll live forever...
...Live as if you'll die tomorrow

Vivere Senza Rimpianti

My mother shocked many people when she was asked this around a bunch of other mothers and instead of saying that she wanted me to be happy or caring or healthy, that she wanted me to be skeptical.

The most important thing any child can learn is the consequences of their own actions; in particular, they need to learn the human consequences of their own actions. In fact, that's probably the single most important thing anyone can learn.

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Lol, Khross....I can't tell you how many times my Dad said that to me...

"Well, if you do that, you are going to have to live with the results!"

I didn't learn that lesson easily.

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Dream as if you'll live forever...
...Live as if you'll die tomorrow

Vivere Senza Rimpianti

I can't say it's an easy lesson, Kirra. In truth, learning the lesson perfectly means transcending the boundaries of your own humanity. In general, learning this lesson means you have to think about everyone else before you think about yourself; and that can be its own kind of trap.

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Lesson 2: The toilet and proper usage...

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Number one thing I want my kid to learn is confidence.

Don't "toot" in public

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Dream as if you'll live forever...
...Live as if you'll die tomorrow

Vivere Senza Rimpianti

Responsibility, what it means for the self, how to identify actions which show it in others and what the lack of it usually leads to.

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"...but there exists also in the human heart a depraved taste for equality, which impels the weak to attempt to lower the powerful to their own level and reduces men to prefer equality in slavery to inequality with freedom." - De Tocqueville

I want my child to understand how to solve problems and think critically.

To be self-reliant and responsible. To take ownership of their actions, good and bad, and to accept the concequences of those actions.

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Ezekiel 23:19-20 

Lesson 3: don't waste time waiting for the other shoe to drop.

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Couple of things I learnt from my parents.

While money isn’t the start all and end all, it hard to live a happy life without any of it.
Work smart, not work hard.
Do what is right, not what is popular.
You can’t help others if you can’t first set yourself up in a position to help.
It is okay to be selfish sometimes, but not always.
Real friends are the rarest things in this world, when you find one, cherish it like your own life.
Sometimes it’s not love, just passion/lust. Give things time and true love will not fade.
Stop thinking about the problem, start thinking of a solution.

There’s so many more things my parents taught me, hard to put it all down on paper.

I did all my homework, got a good job, that's about it. Maybe I unconsciously learned other important things but nothing I can think of.




I think this is learned inevitably for every person regardless of parenting.

You can't escape yourself, so be true to yourself.

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"Dress cops up as soldiers, give them military equipment, train them in military tactics, tell them they’re fighting a ‘war,’ and the consequences are predictable." —Radley Balko

I never did any homework, ever, in any level of education, and I got a good job anyway :p



I think you'd be wrong. Many people die before they learn this lesson, and some live long lives despite never really completely understanding this.

Really? If that's true then that's pretty sweet.

You can have anything you want out of life.

You just have to earn it.

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In time, this too shall pass.

My school district had a strict no-homework policy (when I was attending Jr. and Sr. high school). The only real exception might be if we were given a reading assignment, and didn't make good use of study hall to finish it.

How the seashells work.