The Glade 4.0

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 7:26 am 
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Lucky Bastard
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Now that we know what most here really do with their days, lets hear another story from each of us.

Make it up. Be as creative as possible. No semblance of reality needed here.

So, what do you REALLY do all day?

My real job is test pattern watcher for a major TV station. I have nearly burned out my eyeballs doing this as I stare for 8+ hours on end without blinking. Fortunately, they have a good medical plan and I get free eyeball transplants as needed. I don't ask where the clinic gets it's nearly limitless supply of eyeballs as I have had this done many times so far as have many of my coworkers. When I get home, Oonagh doesn't recognize me as my eye color has been changed and calls the police because she thinks there is an intruder in the house. After the police leave, I cuddle up on the couch and proceed to read all the junk mail I have received that day, since I don't watch TV at home as that is all I do all day.

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This must be Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 7:34 am 
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Junk food taste tester.

(Oh wait... that's my dream job, especially if they have a work-at-home program)

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 7:42 am 
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The Dancing Cat
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Location: Ohio
I am a model for rubber fists available at your local adult store. Sometimes I get cramps.

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In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first. - George Carlin


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 7:45 am 
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Home of the Whopper
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I harvest eyeballs. Mainly for use in a government program that provides transplants for TV test pattern watchers, but occasionally we sell the ones that came from comedians and clowns to junk food companies that place them as a "secret ingredient" in some of their new products to test their junk food taste testers taste buds to "see" if they can taste anything funny...

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 7:54 am 
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pbp Hack
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I'm a plant manager at a factory that makes those little grabby thingies that people use when they harvest eyeballs.

It's a boring job since we don't have that many plants, just a couple of trees outside the break room.

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I prefer to think of them as "Fighting evil in another dimension"


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:28 am 
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I'm the special curator for comic art and watercolors at the International Museum of Fine Arts for the Blind.

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"... Mirrorshades prevent the forces of normalcy from realizing that one is crazed and possibly dangerous. They are the symbol of the sun-staring visionary, the biker, the rocker, the policeman, and similar outlaws." - Bruce Sterling, preface to Mirrorshades


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:33 am 
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adorabalicious
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I work with the Smithsonian in its new species division. My job is to come up with new recipes for the new life created. We are currently looking for something flavored halfway between shrimp and pork.

I also occasionally am called to fight the aliens that for some reason only seek to invade Smithsonian buildings.

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"...but there exists also in the human heart a depraved taste for equality, which impels the weak to attempt to lower the powerful to their own level and reduces men to prefer equality in slavery to inequality with freedom." - De Tocqueville


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:14 pm 
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Not the ranger you're looking for
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I read to the deaf.

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"Good? Bad? I'm the guy with the gun." - Ash Williams


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:15 pm 
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Evil Bastard™
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Location: Doomstadt, Latveria
I'm secretly an ally of the Avengers.

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Facism is not a school of thought, it is a racial slur.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:43 pm 
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Web Ninja
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Mods have been the only ones to know long enough...

I'm actually the poster behind "Elmarnieh"


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:51 pm 
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Irish Princess
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Rofl ... You made me drop my phone Lenas :p


It's already broke too :p

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Dream as if you'll live forever...
...Live as if you'll die tomorrow


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:51 pm 
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Manchurian Mod
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I'm the admin for a Chinese government discussion forum.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:01 pm 
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Rihannsu Commander

Joined: Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:31 am
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Location: Cincinnati OH
I cut down trees. I eat my lunch. I go to the lavatory. On Wednesdays I go shopping
and have buttered scones for tea. I skip and jump. I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing and hang around in bars. I wear high heels, suspendies, and a bra. I wish I'd been a girlie, Just like my dear Papa.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:28 pm 
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I sit in on Pentagon war meetings but all I do is scream at people and throw coffee.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:31 pm 
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Explorer

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Location: Garden State
I'm an employee for Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant #3. We're currently a little busy at the moment handling a mild crisis, unfortunately. So I don't have much time to talk.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:32 pm 
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Explorer

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Location: Garden State
Kairtane wrote:
I read to the deaf.

:lol:


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:40 pm 
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The King
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I'm a porn star by the name of Stroker John. I've starred in such movies as "Two Pump Chump" 1-38, "One Hand, One Bottle of Lotion, and a Whole Lotta Paper Towels", and the critically acclaimed western "True Grunt".

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"It is true that democracy undermines freedom when voters believe they can live off of others' productivity, when they modify the commandment: 'Thou shalt not steal, except by majority vote.' The politics of plunder is no doubt destructive of both morality and the division of labor."


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:44 pm 
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Home of the Whopper
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TheRiov wrote:
I cut down trees. I eat my lunch. I go to the lavatory. On Wednesdays I go shopping
and have buttered scones for tea. I skip and jump. I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing and hang around in bars. I wear high heels, suspendies, and a bra. I wish I'd been a girlie, Just like my dear Papa.


He's a Lumberjack and he's ok....

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:46 pm 
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Rihannsu Commander

Joined: Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:31 am
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Location: Cincinnati OH
LadyKate wrote:
He's a Lumberjack and he's ok....


Thank you for making my subtext.... text... ;-)


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:51 pm 
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Near Ground
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Location: Chattanooga, TN
Mostly I'm a desk agent at a desk for the Department of Redundancy Department mostly.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:52 pm 
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God of the IRC
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I'm a figment of your imagination.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:59 pm 
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Near Ground
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Location: Chattanooga, TN
Mookhow = Image :?:


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 3:08 pm 
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Oberon's Playground
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I'm actually a Tuatha Dé Danann special counterintelligence agent whose primary responsibility is ensuring the world does not believe in faeries.

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Well Ali Baba had them forty thieves, Scheherezade had a thousand tales
But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves you got a brand of magic never fails...
...Mister Aladdin, sir, What will your pleasure be?
Let me take your order, Jot it down -You ain't never had a friend like me

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 3:10 pm 
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The artist formerly known as Raber
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Location: WA state
I'm a Binary Recyling Technician. I separate code. It's not too hard since there's only 10 different bins we have to sort things into.

In my spare time I'm a Divorce Photographer.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 3:11 pm 
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Oberon's Playground
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Ulfynn wrote:
I'm a Binary Recyling Technician. I separate code. It's not too hard since there's only 10 different bins we have to sort things into.


I love this...

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Well Ali Baba had them forty thieves, Scheherezade had a thousand tales
But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves you got a brand of magic never fails...
...Mister Aladdin, sir, What will your pleasure be?
Let me take your order, Jot it down -You ain't never had a friend like me

█ ♣ █


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