The Glade 4.0

A hint: When I walk in the door after work and say 'Gah, there's something evil brewing in the cat box' that should be your cue to go deal with the damn thing.

The cat litter needs sifting every day. Two big cats. You know how much they eat? Guess where it goes. And guess where they go when the box isn't clean? Your bed! And guess what I get to spend my day off doing? Laundry!

Cat poo before caffeine. There ought to be a law.

So many snarky comments to make about the slothful 'murrican dude lifestyle. So many evil innuendos and base canards spring to mind. I think I'll just offer Taamar my sport instead.

Get on it Shel, those are the sounds of the guillotine blade being hoisted to the top of the frame. You still have time before she pulls the release cord. Not much mind you.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

The cats crap on your bed when the litter box is full?
I would be getting rid of some cats.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

The cat poops on Shel's bed, not mine.

Suppose there was only one bathroom in the whole world
Suppose there's poop all over it, standing urine on the floor, and a smell that burns your eyes
Suppose you have to walk into it barefoot
Suppose you clean your feet by licking them
What do you do? Better the bed (which can be stripped and washed) than the carpet or the couch, and a cat that holds it waiting for a clean box will damage his kidneys and that's not a cheap vet visit. Not the cat's fault, though a smarter cat wouldn't have done it with Shel watching. I think it was making a comment, because it still had plenty once I cleaned the box.

Now suppose you don't have the human sensibilities to be (as) offended by all those things.

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"It's real, grew up in trife life, the times of white lines
The hype vice, murderous nighttimes and knife fights invite crimes" - Nasir Jones

Then I wouldn't have to poop on the bed, but that's not the case. A cat's sense of smell is much more sensitive than ours, and cats hate getting their feet wet. Any animal behaviourist will, when asked about inappropriate elimination, inquire immediately about the cleanliness and location of the litter box; this isn't just anthropomorphizing on my part.

Well if its just his bed and not yours, I wouldn't worry about it. Don't clean it up either.
When he is tired and goes to sleep in a bed covered in cat excrement, he'll start thinking about cleaning.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Not sure why this post is here... you two are still roommates?

They're, like, married dude.

Is cleaning up after cats some sort of duty assigned to him exclusively?

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“The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government.” - Thomas Paine

I beleive that yes, it is indeed his duty to take care of the pussy.

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Holy shitsnacks!

It is. I am responsible for a much larger share of the housekeeping in return for which he takes on the few things I hate most. Theoretically he does the litter box, the laundry, and dishes. I do the vaccuuming, bathrooms, kitchen cleanup that isn't dishes, windows, floor scrubbing, dusting, and general tidying up. I say 'theoretically' because we don't have a washer and dryer in the new house yet, so we are using a friends, which means he does his one load on his day off and I do my laundry and the household stuff (bedding and towels) on mine.

As it happened, this mornings mishap bumped me from needing to do four loads today (silly small washer) to seven. I decided to go to the laundromat and do it all at once in the massive machines. Three loads. Two hours. Twenty bucks. Done.

Right, and I can think of nothing good that can come of calling your spouse out on a public forum rather than at home... where you both live. Buy hey, different strokes, different folks.

Although, I don't recall that psychic ability was a trait of the ponytail.

"Hey Shel, would you be a dear and clean out the catbox? Mao just had his October revolution in there, and the proletariat is revolting."

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Holy shitsnacks!

It's a rant forum. I was awakened hours ahead of schedule on my day off to clean the box and do the laundry. I'm a bit surly about it all. If it were an actual argument, as opposed to a thing that exasperates me but is totally forgivable (once I've gotten a backrub), I would not have posted here.

Dude, you remember our cat's name?

I see your point, but the box isn't my responsibilty. It needs to be dealt with daily, and there's a word for asking a man to do the same thing every day: 'nagging'. After nearly 7 years I'm still trying to find the balance between not getting any help and nagging him to distraction. Aaaand.... still surly.

Blowjobs.
Works every time.
There is no other way to train a man faster or easier.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

I'm not sure I want to create a mental link between a hummer and the litter box. Beyond that, using sex as a reward is a slippery slope (pun intended), and I refuse to play the bullshit female witholding-as-punishment game.

I see where you're coming from, but you don't have to make a direct connection between the two.

Just drop BJs randomly when you are in a good mood. The element of surprise is how it works...the whole point is that he cannot pinpoint a cause and effect between his behavior and when they happen....so he constantly tries to do things to please you... it works really well and its fun too.

And, personally, I believe that any person (man or woman) who witholds sex as a form of 'punishment' ought to be shot.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Photographic memory. I remember a *lot* of stuff. Especially if its something I can associate an image with. The idea of a big siamese cat with a little red book named Mao? You bet your *** I'm gonna remember that

No idea what the other cat's name is though. I think its something egyptian, but I'm probably wrong.

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Holy shitsnacks!

"Shamere". Happened when Shel was texting me about the new Siamese and his predective text interpreted wrong. They are also known as 'The fat one' and 'The stupid one'.

And Mao is the fat one yes?

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Holy shitsnacks!

Oh, and it was Shamere who did the deed while looking Shel in the eye this morning. It was most definately a comment.

Our cat almost had to find a new home for stupid activities. When we moved into our own house (almost five years ago now) he would stay on the second floor and come down to the first floor to visit and without reason or provocation would feel it necessary to urinate on any cloths in the laundry area.

We still use a baby gate upstairs (was originally for Allanna, but has been able to navigate through it for years) and he stays on "his" side of it and no more incidents. While I do not like changing kitty litter either (and it was promised that I would never have to when we got the cat) I still do scoop it. But I really loath the smell of cat urine and I it had me very close to finding him a new home (despite being a member of our family for nearly 10 years at that time).

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Gorse

Taamar have you looked at any of the automatic/self-cleaning litter boxes?

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth