The Glade 4.0

So apparently tomorrow the world goes to hell. I figured we could post some wills on here:

I bequeath the following:

To my dog Faith I bequeath the nearly full bag of Hill's Science Diet in the cupboard and sole care of the idiot dog (Gracie).
To Elmo I leave all the sharp and dangerous implements in my house so he can better fight off the hoard of looters.
To Foamy I leave the unabridged complete works of Calvin & Hobbes (bring a dolly, it's a pair of HEAVY tomes).
To Farsky I leave my antique lamps so he can make something cool and Steampunky out of them.
To LadyKate I leave my possessed/haunted demon dolls that live in the crawlspace upstairs.

I should also warn potential looters about the immortal fish (Duncan McCleod of the Clan McCleod) that guards the house from his perch atop the fridge.

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To my trash cans: I never have to empty you.

Nice.

To Foamy of course our child and my love
To Elmo my signature for all documents of support for canidates
To Hannibal pagers, a copy of goldeneye, and my comcast bill- YELL AT THOSE Bastards for me
To Michael lots and lots of See's chocolate- Yummy
To Mus- Moosey Hugs and whatever your brain can fancy
To Khross- My job, so you can fix the public school system

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"None is more important, none more legitimate, than that of rendering the people safe as they are the
ultimate guardians of their own liberty."- Thomas Jefferson

"Yeah, I'm rehearsing my poker face. I don't handle stupid well. *sigh*" - Farsky

To LadyKate I leave my guitar. May you make more beautiful music with it than I have.

To Raltar I leave my Xbox360, Wii, GameCube, Nintendo64, Super Nintendo, and 8 bit NES and all the games for each because I can't think of anyone who plays video games as much as you do.

To Elmo I leave Fortress America. Sad that we didn't get to play again after so many years, but I know you'll enjoy it.

To NiteFox I leave what few Magic: the Gathering cards I have left. I am sure you can find a use for them.

To Taamar I leave my 8 1/2" Wushtof chef's knife and the 3" utility knife. They have been the only knives I have needed for many years now. I have taken as best care of them that I could. I know you will take better care of them and make many a wonderful dish with them.

To Kirra I leave any and all shovels that I have out in my garage as she is the deadliest woman I know when equipped with one.

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This must be Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.

World Population: ~6.92 billion
Estimated population ascending in Rapture: 3.0 million
Percentage of ascending vs. total population: 1 in ~2,334
Glade population: 200 (some of which are known rpg duplicates)

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To Arathain: I leave my library, I know he will give it a good home.

To DarkSiege: I leave all of my cutlery, my pans, my four burner vulcan, my smoker, my fryer, and anything else cooking related he finds in my kitchen, basement or garage. They have become accustomed to a steady hand and the hunger to constantly improve. I feel he could offer that.

To Khross and Aethien: I leave my entire collection of sports cards and memorabilia, currently insured for $600,000, containing unused game tickets to hundreds of major historic sporting events and games, hundreds of autographed jerseys, photos, balls, and helmets, and vintage cards of hall-of-famers dating back to the early 1900's. It will be drafted, item by item, serpentine style. First pick decided by a coin flip.

To DiamondEye: I leave my 35 star American flag, circa 1863. I don't think anyone here would appreciate it quite as much.

To Talya: I leave my acreage in Vermont, such that she could establish citizenship in a real country.

To Vindi: I leave my collection of "real" American money, because he understands what it represents, and I feel those ideals should run strong within our profession.

To Elmo: I leave all of my weapons, save my Chinese stars, which I leave to Lenas.

To Michael: I leave my personal collection of my own short stories and essays, which I doubt I will ever have the courage to attempt to publish.

To Raltar: I leave all of my electronics and gaming platforms from my man-cave, and a bag with beard trimmings in it such that he can give it a proper burial.

To Corolinth: I leave my porn.

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Ezekiel 23:19-20 

Oh yeah! I forgot: to Screening I leave all my tp.

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To Kirra: All my guns; she's the only one here I think is trustworthy enough to have them. Except the shotgun.

To Talya: All my D&D books, so she can feel the joy of having an actual hardcopy text to page through, and she won't even have to pay. She can have all my RIFTS books too; even if they never get played.

To DFK!: He can have all my Rogue Trader and Dark Heresy books

To Oonagh and Foamy: All my stuffed animals, for the kid(s)

To LK and Nitefox: The shotgun. I think they might need it in their neighborhood

To Khross: All my other books

To Arathain: All my Virginia Tech stuff

To Vindi: responsibility for dividing everything else up amongst the rest of you.

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"Hysterical children shrieking about right-wing anything need to go sit in the corner and be quiet while the adults are talking."

Rynar: My promise that the cutlery, etc. will have a good home.

I cannot bequeath anything since I do not think I will be getting pulled to heaven should it be the actual rapture. I will be here on Earth. So...

To all those who remain on earth with me: A cold beer and company to enjoy it with.

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Darksiege
Traveller, Calé, Whisperer
Lead me not into temptation; for I know a shortcut

Screw you people. I'm taking my guitars with me! ALL OF THEM !! :p~~

You know, this is kind of offensive. Leaving things to people implies that you don't think those people are going to be raptured(or whatever you want to call it). That's kinda messed up.

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Los Angeles Kings 2014 Stanley Cup Champions

"I love this **** team right here."
-Jonathan Quick

well according to the stories... this is also supposed to be the Zombie Apocalypse. Because of this, maybe people are just planning on being zombies.

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Darksiege
Traveller, Calé, Whisperer
Lead me not into temptation; for I know a shortcut

Matthew 24:36, just asking?

My will already leaves everything of any value to my daughter, so to any of you that remain to read these words come Monday, I leave my hopes for you to have better luck on the second round.

Hopefully, we'll be sharing a good glass of whatever heavenly brew there is while we listen to Gabriel play the blues like they've never been played before.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

Uh.. I was just joking around. I wasn't even thinking about Rapture. I think everyone else was too.

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"Hysterical children shrieking about right-wing anything need to go sit in the corner and be quiet while the adults are talking."

I wasn't even close to thinking this. Actually, I was confused by the thought of this thread because I was figuring what was the point of leaving anything to anyone if we were all going to be dead.

This isn't hellfire out here. Stop taking this all so seriously.

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This must be Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.

Yeah, Hellfire happens Sunday or five months from now, depending on who you believe, or goes back to we don't have a clue if you take Matthew 24:36 seriously.

I'll go with Matthew 24;36 myself.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

Only 3 million? Where you pulling that number. I was always using eleven percent though I forget my source too ATM. 3 million wont even cover all the children under the age of accountability.

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I prefer to think of them as "Fighting evil in another dimension"

And yes Matthew 24:36 ftw


I'm not naming any names. It's not for me to judge any of your hearts.

And the only thing I'd want to leave anyone on this board would be this: if I'm gone and your here, that means I was right. Maybe there is still hope for you. There's going to be a great deceiver. Don't buy what he's selling. Hold out for Christ. We'll be back soon.

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I prefer to think of them as "Fighting evil in another dimension"

I got it from here, which came up on a quick Google search. I didn't exactly do a lot of in-depth research, here.

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Ah okay. I don't know a lot about this alleged prophet and his beliefs and his criteria for rapture. Seems rather low ball to me. Though I did hear on the radio this is his second attempt at predicting the rapture.

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I prefer to think of them as "Fighting evil in another dimension"

Zombiesss....yummmm, brainnnnsssssss...

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"Said I never had much use for one, never said I didn't know how to use one!"~ Matthew Quigley

"nothing like a little meow in bed at night" ~ Bruskey

"I gotta float my stick same as you" Hondo Lane

"Fill your hand you son of a *****!"

Do you have any Grey Poupon?

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

I don't as a matter of fact! I need to fix that!

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"Said I never had much use for one, never said I didn't know how to use one!"~ Matthew Quigley

"nothing like a little meow in bed at night" ~ Bruskey

"I gotta float my stick same as you" Hondo Lane

"Fill your hand you son of a *****!"

I have to say I had to chuckle a little when Oonagh left Foamy their son. I was like "What they're not coming with ya?" Then I realized it was not as literal as it may seem.

Well, I guess in order to be offended, you'd have to believe in the secret whisking away of the few "elect". In order to be one of the few "elect", you'd have to believe in the secret whisking away thingy. Since I don't, feel free to leave me your stuff.

Thanks Rynar - well said.

Hey, I'm still here, when's this supposed to happen? Anybody still there?

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"Dress cops up as soldiers, give them military equipment, train them in military tactics, tell them they’re fighting a ‘war,’ and the consequences are predictable." —Radley Balko