The Glade 4.0

Woman allegedly beaten with frozen armadillo
by: Kate Shellnutt

Only in Texas: Dallas police are on the lookout for a man who could face assault charges for throwing a frozen armadillo at a 57-year-old woman near Dallas.

The woman, My Fox Dallas-Fort Worth reports, met the man in a parking lot to purchase the armadillo carcass, which she planned to eat.

During a fight over its price, he hit her with the animal in the leg and the chest, leaving bruises on her body.

According to the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department, Texas law prohibits the sale of live armadillos, but a few Texans still go after their meat.

Those people who eat armadillo meat will find that thorough cooking should make the meat noninfectious (of mycobacterial leprosy). However, the greatest hazard of being infected (if any) may be encountered during cleaning and dressing of the animals.

Eating armadillos is not widespread in Texas today, although it has been popular among south-of-the-border residents for more than a hundred years. Many Texans, especially during the depression years of the 1930s, dined on the “Hoover Hog,” referring to the armadillo as “poor man’s pork.”

19 Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. 20 There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first. - George Carlin

I choose you Frozadillo!

Frozdillo uses icy strike!

It's super effective!

Armadillos are New World placental mammals, known for having a leathery armor shell. Dasypodidae is the only surviving family in the order Cingulata, part of the superorder Xenarthra along with the anteaters and sloths. The word armadillo is Spanish for "little armored one". The Aztec called them azotochtli, Nahuatl for “turtle-rabbit.”[1]

The nine-banded armadillo also serves science through its unusual reproductive system, in which genetically identical quadruplets are born in each litter.[12][13][14] Because they are always genetically identical, the group of four young provides a good subject for scientific, behavioral or medical tests that need consistent biological and genetic makeup in the test subjects. This is the only reliable manifestation of polyembryony in the class Mammalia, and only exists within the genus Dasypus and not in all armadillos, as is commonly believed. Other species which display this trait include parasitoid wasps, certain flatworms and various aquatic invertebrates.[13]