The Glade 4.0

Looking for a companion on a dating site is like shopping for a used car at Carmax. You go to the website, fill in the criteria you're looking for. You are then shown a list of matches. The odds of finding a perfect match are almost nil, but you decide what you can or cannot live with. As you look through the list, if you see something that catches your eye, you click the link and read up a bit more. You may decide it wasn't a good fit after all, or you may like what you see. If you are pleased enough, you can fire off a message saying "hey, I wanna check that out".

The big difference between dating sites and Carmax, though, is that the cars aren't doing the same thing.

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Most dating sites have about a 10:1 Male:Female ratio in my experience.

Of all the sites I tried, OKCupid.com yielded the best results. (most detailed information on the individual, most method of comparison, better likelihood of a positive response, and you actually find out enough about the person to strike up an intelligent conversation about something you have in common) OKC also has places you can submit your profile for review by others and have them suggest tweaks about what dealbreakers you might have in your profile, or other things you can do to spruce it up.

I actually made a couple of new friends from OKC too.

PlentyofFish.com is a wasteland of drug addicts, or those looking to cheat on a spouse, etc.

The pay sites are marginally better in that it weeds out some of the people who are there looking to cheat on a spouse. (afraid to use a credit card one would assume, and probably harder to justify to themselves that they're 'just looking')

Many people look for a BMW when they can only afford a Toyota.
Or they shop for a Toyota, which is within their means, but what they REALLY need for their lifestyle is a Subaru Outback.
Or they try to buy a standard without realizing they have no idea how to drive a stick, and would be better off with an automatic.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

LK, can you rephrase your analogies in terms that are more explicitly sexual in nature please?

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To be fair, looking for a companion the old fashioned way really isn't much different.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.

hey moo, do they have an events & adventures in your town? I've heard good things about it, and it seems meeting people in a casual/fun atmosphere where everyone's participating in an activity they're interested in is a good way to meet genuine people with similar interests

Sure, that'll be $3.99 a minute, please.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Hopwin, can you stop being creepy?

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Pretty sure he was just jesting, Khross. That's how I took it anyway.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Khross, can you rephrase your request in terms that are more explicitly sexual in nature please?

I met my wife on an online dating site.

The entire concept is an exercise in "accuracy through volume" if you know what I mean.

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"Hysterical children shrieking about right-wing anything need to go sit in the corner and be quiet while the adults are talking."

When I was in my 20's I used match.com as a fool-proof way to slut myself through large volumes of women who had zero chance of ever talking to, or seeing me again if I didn't want them to.

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Ezekiel 23:19-20 

This isn't exactly on-topic, but has anyone tried meetup.com? It's not really a dating site; just a site for finding/creating local meetups with people based on a particular interest.

It seems like a neat idea that could supplement your dating efforts. Look at it as primarily a way to just go out, have fun, make friends. But if you should happen to meet someone that you hit it off with, all the better. At least you'll know one thing that you both enjoy doing together.

It could also be a good opportunity to diversify your hobbies and interests. Maybe pick a couple of new interests that you don't currently know anything about and start going to meetups. Ex. start going to wine tastings, or whatever. Looks good on the profile page to have multiple, unrelated interests/hobbies. But beyond that, being well-rounded and interested in multiple subjects always helps with the actual dating part.

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Sail forth! steer for the deep waters only!
Reckless, O soul, exploring, I with thee, and thou with me;
For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.

I looked at it for my area and there wasn't anything in it Stathol. A shame but not unexpected since people around here just don't seem to get the whole social-media-networking thing.

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I met my wife on a mud.

I did the whole dating site thing a couple of years back due to peer pressure. While my friend got a husband out of it, my experience was quite different.

Finding a companion is more about luck than statistics, and unfortunately stupid luck not something you can actively control or manipulate >.<

I know a guy who looked up all the single women within a 50 mile radius of him on MySpace and sent them all a very polite form letter complimenting their looks/education/etc and one person took the bait and they got married 15 months later. True story.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

The most important lesson any man can learn about women is that a .300 batting average is considered fantastic in baseball.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.

Yeah, but you aren't considered to be a true power hitter unless you average 30 or more home runs a year. Also, the seasonal RBI metric demonstrates the importance of a strong wing-man.

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Ezekiel 23:19-20 

One should never underestimate the importance of a good wing-man. /nod

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"Dress cops up as soldiers, give them military equipment, train them in military tactics, tell them they’re fighting a ‘war,’ and the consequences are predictable." —Radley Balko

I always did better as a wing-man than as the top gun.

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In time, this too shall pass.

That's because Hollywood sets up guys who look like this:


to expect to date women like this:

That's because guys like hot chicks, and women like money. The guy up top has money, and the chick on the bottom has everything else.

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Ezekiel 23:19-20 

There are women who still marry for love and not money, you know.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Well yeah, which would be fine if it were only rich guys acting like anything less than a supermodel is beneath them because a plain dorky dude in a move (rich actor playing a non-rich character) ends up with Katherine Effing Heigl (gorgeous woman playing a gorgeous woman).

Not that the flip side is any stupider. Don't even get me started on the 'princess' fetish.