The Glade 4.0

Five-year-old boy lives as girl in youngest case of Gender Identity Disorder

A little boy who decided he was a girl trapped in a boy's body has become one of the youngest-ever children to have his decision backed by the NHS - aged just four.

With his blonde pigtails and purple tutu, Zach Avery, now five, has been living as a girl for more than a year - after he first refused to live as a boy when he turned three.

Little Zach was just three when he began refusing to live as a boy, instead choosing to wear pink dresses and ribbons in his long, blonde hair - because he has Gender Identity Disorder (GID).

And the primary school he attends in Essex has even changed the kids' toilets to gender-neutral Unisex in support of Zach since his official diagnosis last year, aged four.

Zach is one of the youngest in Britain ever to be diagnosed with GID - meaning he feels like he's a girl trapped in a boy's body.

Mum Theresa Avery, 32, said Zach used to be a 'normal' little boy who loved Thomas the Tank Engine, but suddenly at the end of 2010, he decided he wanted to live as a girl.

He became obsessed with the girly kids' TV character Dora the Explorer and started dressing in girls clothing.

Parents Theresa and Darren Avery, 41, became worried by Zach's behaviour and took him to the doctors.

After numerous consultations and observations, he was officially diagnosed by NHS specialists with Gender Identity Disorder (GID), making Zach one of the youngest affected children in the UK.

Mum-of-four Theresa said: "He just turned round to me one day when he was three and said: 'Mummy, I'm a girl'. I assumed he was just going through a phase and just left it at that.

"But then it got serious and he would become upset if anyone referred to him as a boy.

"He used to cry and try to cut off his willy out of frustration."

Concerned Theresa and Darren took him to a specialist at Tavistock and Patman Foundation Trust in London.

At first his parents thought he may be autistic, but after several months a child phycologist diagnosed Zach, affectionately called Zachy, with GID.

The dedicated specialists explained to them that gender identity disorder is a conflict between a person's actual physical gender and the gender that person identifies himself or herself as.

Theresa said: "They told us that although he had a male body, his brain was telling him he was a girl."

And Zach's school - Purfleet Primary in Essex - has even turned their toilet block gender-neutral to support him.

Theresa added: "They have changed the toilets for Key Stage 1 pupils into Unisex instead of male/female and they address him as a girl, which is what he wants.

"When he gets a bit older, to Key Stage 2, then obviously the law changes and there will be more difficulties surrounding the bathroom issue, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it - it may be that Zach will use the staff toilets.

"We explained to the other kids at the school that Zachy's body was that of a boy but in his brain he was a girl. We said Zach was just happier being a girl than a boy.

"But the other kids haven't batted an eyelid, they've accepted Zach as Zach and there's been no problems at the school with bullying.

"The school has been brilliant and really, really supportive."

When he goes to school, Zach wears a girl's trouser uniform and black boots with pink trim, which his mother said is female but still neutral.

And mum said that although she misses her little boy, the family is very supportive of Zachy.

She said: "He just wants to be like a little girl and he's very happy with his long blonde hair, pink and red bedroom and a wardrobe full of girls clothes.

"He likes playing with his sister's old toys but he still loves Dr Who too and playing with his brother. And we still put some neutral clothes in his wardrobe if he ever decides he wants to wear them.

"We leave it up to him to decide what he wants to do - if he changes his mind and wants to be a boy again then he does, but if he doesn't, he doesn't.

She admitted: "I would love to have my son back, but I want him to be happy. If this is the route he wants to take - if this is what makes him happy - then so be it. I would rather him have my full support.

"People need to be aware of this condition because it's very common but even many family support workers have never heard of cases in children. There are people out there but they don't want to talk about it."

Figures from the Tavistock and Patman Foundation Trust clinic - the national body for GID - revealed 165 children have been diagnosed with GID this year.

A spokesperson at Tavistock Clinic in London said they were unable to comment on individual case, but only seven children under the age of 5 were diagnosed last year - making Zach one of the youngest.

The spokesperson said: "Tavistock Clinic had 97 referrals in 2009/2010; 139 in 2010/2011 and thus far this year 165 referrals.

"The trend in referrals has been up over the years - this may reflect greater awareness.

"We see children and young people up to the age of 18, from across the UK, who are experiencing difficulties in the development of their gender identity.

"This includes children who are unhappy with their biological sex. Some may be boys who prefer activities and role associated with the opposite sex, some may also identify as the opposite sex and vice versa for girls.

"In general when younger children are referred it is in relation to cross gender preferences in play, play mates and activities. It is more unusual for children of this age to express cross gender identification - that is the wish or belief that they belong to the opposite sex.

"The diagnosis of GID is made by the key workers working with the young person. We will also assess their general wellbeing. We remain in contact with young people often for many years.

"Our aim is not to predict or direct the outcome, but rather to support the young person in their general development as well as develop a trusting collaborative therapeutic relationship in which it is possible to openly explore their feelings about their gender."

In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first. - George Carlin

Do ever want to just grab someone and say...WTF is wrong with you?

If a child has a strong urge to be the opposite gender, how can you not allow them to follow that path? I don't think it would be healthy to force them to dress and act as a boy, if they identified more with being a girl.

In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first. - George Carlin

If putting him in a dress and stockings keeps him from self castration...let the **** go. I am not going to pretend I know better or that he can be fixed. Who is to say there is anything to fix. Kid is just wired different. If he wants to dump the junk for something softer to touch...18. Not before then.

Is the disorder real? Yea. Not that I would really call it that. Like I said, he is just wired different. In fact, I believe it more now than if this had come up a few years down the road. It doesn't sound like a scream for attention.

All that being said, thanks for taking things public Mom. Kids don't forget ****, his class mates may be cool with it now but in a few years. Kids are **** cruel.

I'm a little unclear on what the decision in question is. That you have the disorder? That ought to be diagnosed by a professional - preferably more than one. To have surgery? 18+. Maybe even older; 18 is where we arbitrarily assign "adulthood" to begin but there's still significant thought process development for a couple years. Teenagers generally have a hard time understanding the difference between "should be" and "is".

As to the kid trying to castrate himself, I'm a bit suspicious of that. I doubt very much that any small child would have the pain tolerance necessary to seriously proceed with it.

Like Hopwin said, kids go through phases. There could be other causes as well; autism or Asberger's should be looked at for example, in a small child. I think at that age any diagnosis of gender identity disorder needs to be looked at carefully. This is a highly politicized topic and even medical professionals are not above seeing what they want to see.

In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first. - George Carlin

Sorry the decision is to let your 4 year old son decide to live his life as a girl with the ultimate outcome to be hormone therapy and surgery.

19 Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. 20 There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

Do ever want to just grab someone and say...WTF is wrong with you?

First World Problems.

What harm can there be if you let him decide to live as a girl, if he has a severe reaction to being associated with the boy identity? I think life altering surgery, should not be allowed until way further down the line. But, this child's behavior is not really indicative of a phase. Lots of little boys like to wear mommy's high heels, from what I hear from mom's I work with...they have said they handle it by letting them do it, not giving a reaction, then the child gets bored with it.

In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first. - George Carlin

19 Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. 20 There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

Do ever want to just grab someone and say...WTF is wrong with you?

That's quite possible. I also don't know that a medical professional would tell (or would be well-advised to tell) a small child "you are a girl trapped in a boy's body."

The dedicated specialists explained to them that gender identity disorder is a conflict between a person's actual physical gender and the gender that person identifies himself or herself as.

Theresa said: "They told us that although he had a male body, his brain was telling him he was a girl."

There's no telling what a little kid will think hearing something like that. My newly-6-year-old last week overheard me telling my wife how we found some illegal aliens in this guy's barn. He had given them each a banana and a water bottle to keep them there while he phoned us. When I told my wife this, my daughter overheard and promptly asked why they were all eating a giant banana. I had to explain to her (while trying really hard not to laugh) that there was not, in fact, a single giant banana but that each had their own banana.

In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first. - George Carlin

^This illustrates perfectly to me why they should not "diagnose" children at such a young age.

Do ever want to just grab someone and say...WTF is wrong with you?

My guess is that the medical professionals did say it was a phase at first...and then as the Parents were not satisfied with that diagnosis, they continued to seek other opinions till they found a Doctor who gave them a diagnosis that they agreed with.