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 Post subject: Real stories of the ER
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 4:13 am 
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Feel free to add your own medical misadventures.


Tonight a slightly older, 58, person brought her dead tropical bird to the ER. I think it was a cocatoo (it was big, I am no expert on tropical birds). She was near hysterical worried about watever caused its death was killer her... Maybe it was her cannary in the coal mine of crazy. I had to leave after the ER DR started giving me and an another nurse death glares for trying to do the Monty Python Dead parokeet sketch in the bakc of the room. A fun fun break from normal ER calls.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 10:34 am 
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When I was a kid, my dad had to perform emergency surgery on a guy from the local jail because another inmate had stabbed him in the gut with a #2 pencil.
My dad brought home the pencil and passed it around the dinner table and a couple of us got to take to school for show and tell that week. (We were the weird kids always bringing gallstones and kidney stones and stuff to school...)

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:17 pm 
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One from my sister's residency in KY:

You know those plastic clips that hold pairs of socks together at the store? They look something like this:
Image

A man comes into the ER with one of these jammed up his urethra so far that he can't reach it. Somewhere along the process of extracting it, the ER doctor asks him why he had inserted said clip in said pecker. The man hesitates for a moment and then,

"Well...I guess I'm just weird."

Best foreign body explanation ever. His response became the go-to explanation for every "why..." question asked in the ER for the rest of the week.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 1:07 pm 
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Must have had a pretty manly urethra. Wow.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 2:17 pm 
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We had a 7 year old with a battery really far up the nose, thank god it was only a AAA. That 9volt would be killer

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 2:27 pm 
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One day about 35 years ago, my roommate cut his hand pretty bad washing up after a party. A glass broke in his hand and we couldn't stop the bleeding. I wrapped his hand up in a towel and took him to the ER. The ER was fairly slow for once and we got him right in to get stitched up.

A couple of ambulances came in rolling gurneys into the back while he was getting the hand sewn. All of a sudden, a nurse comes bursting out of the back and lit up in the emergency room (35 years ago), obviously mad as hell about something.

After a minute another nurse comes out to talk to her. The conversation was very overhear-able.

"I don't care that he's black, I don't care that he's queer, I don't even care that he's an addict and has overdosed. What bugs the **** out of me is that he has on the same dress i was wearing last night and he looks better in it.

She stubbed out her cigarette and went back into the patch em up area.

My roommate said he would of accused me of making it up but he saw the guy on the way out as they were trying to resuscitate him. We never did find out if he made it.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 9:42 pm 
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My patient came in with hand cellulitis. Thumb was swollen and hot to the touch. I go in to assess him and he tells me he thinks he was bit by a spider and he has his iPhone right there and shows me this god awful video of a huge hairy spider in a sink at this house he just bought. I spend 5 minutes watching his video and agreeing with him that I have never seen a spider that nasty. I tell him to show the dr, that he might know what kind it is....

Before I leave...
Dr walks in and says: when did u last shoot up
The guy: today
Dr: you shooting up in your thumb?
Guy: yep, I just came in to get antibiotics
Dr: you have cellulitis from shooting up, you gonna stop using heroin?
Guy: yea I know, nope not gonna stop
Dr: ok I will get the scripts for you.




Last damn time I spend watching a video without cking the history first.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 8:27 am 
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This is why people in ER that really need treatment have longer waits.

We had 15-20 people in the waiting room, waiting to get into ER, we are completely full and there are no hospital beds left for admits. A young girl walks in and comes to the triage counter and states she is having chest pain, "feels like an elephant sitting on my chest". ER policy is anyone with chest pain is a straight back...they go ahead of everyone and get a room and treatment immediately. So, they bring this girl to me, we do the extensive chest pain work up with labs and EKG and X-rays. Then after those are done, the girl (who has no Insurance, I might add) states she is feeling much better and the chest pain has gone away...but since she is already there, could we do a pregnancy test and check her for STD's.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 8:35 am 
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This thread is reminiscent of FyrFyter's (sp?) thread with stories of idiot 911 callers.

Fester, Kirra, and our other med. professionals, please keep this thread alive with such ridiculous stories. I'm sure you see MORE than your share of boneheaded ppl on a daily basis.

RE: the girl in Kirra's story...there should be some sort of consequences for people who do those sort of things in the ER. That girl is a POS. Send her the bill, garnish her wages, put a lien on whatever she owns. That sort of sh*t ain't right.

EDIT - Kirra, after an episode such as you described, can the "patient" then request additional testing? Seems someone non-insured shouldn't be able to request anything without some proof that they will even be able to pay for the services already provided.

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Last edited by Foamy on Tue Jul 10, 2012 11:23 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 10:36 am 
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Just give her an injection of roughly 21% oxygen and 79% nitrogen. Clear all her problems right up.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 11:29 am 
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This happened a while ago.....

Girl came in with lower abdominal pain, asked to be examined. I got the pelvic room ready and dr comes in for the exam. He is down there adjusting the light and asks me for some forcepts. Then proceeds to pull a Jack Daniels shot glass out.

He looks at it, then says "Jack Daniels is some pretty good whiskey"

I nearly passed out from trying not to laugh ;)

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 3:34 pm 
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Kirra wrote:
This happened a while ago.....

Girl came in with lower abdominal pain, asked to be examined. I got the pelvic room ready and dr comes in for the exam. He is down there adjusting the light and asks me for some forcepts. Then proceeds to pull a Jack Daniels shot glass out.

He looks at it, then says "Jack Daniels is some pretty good whiskey"

I nearly passed out from trying not to laugh ;)

But was that the source of her pain, or was she trying to liquor up her lady-bits to numb the pain that was already there?

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 4:36 pm 
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If that didn't even phase the doctor and he cracked a remark without missing a beat, I'd love to sit him down and buy him a drink and hear about the other stuff he's seen...

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 4:52 pm 
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LadyKate wrote:
I'd love [...] buy him a drink

Might I suggest Jack Daniel's?


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 5:03 pm 
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Well, when you've had to remove a coke bottle from someone's ***, weird things just stop having much of an effect.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 6:09 pm 
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Kaffis Mark V wrote:
Kirra wrote:
This happened a while ago.....

Girl came in with lower abdominal pain, asked to be examined. I got the pelvic room ready and dr comes in for the exam. He is down there adjusting the light and asks me for some forcepts. Then proceeds to pull a Jack Daniels shot glass out.

He looks at it, then says "Jack Daniels is some pretty good whiskey"

I nearly passed out from trying not to laugh ;)

But was that the source of her pain, or was she trying to liquor up her lady-bits to numb the pain that was already there?

This sounds like the end result of a party that I'm incredibly sad that I missed. She sounds like my kind of girl.

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19 Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. 20 There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 6:19 pm 
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Kirra wrote:
This happened a while ago.....

Girl came in with lower abdominal pain, asked to be examined. I got the pelvic room ready and dr comes in for the exam. He is down there adjusting the light and asks me for some forcepts. Then proceeds to pull a Jack Daniels shot glass out.

He looks at it, then says "Jack Daniels is some pretty good whiskey"

I nearly passed out from trying not to laugh ;)


That *is* funny ;) Especially the part where he said JD was "good" whiskey ;)

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 7:43 pm 
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Rynar wrote:
Kaffis Mark V wrote:
Kirra wrote:
This happened a while ago.....

Girl came in with lower abdominal pain, asked to be examined. I got the pelvic room ready and dr comes in for the exam. He is down there adjusting the light and asks me for some forcepts. Then proceeds to pull a Jack Daniels shot glass out.

He looks at it, then says "Jack Daniels is some pretty good whiskey"

I nearly passed out from trying not to laugh ;)

But was that the source of her pain, or was she trying to liquor up her lady-bits to numb the pain that was already there?

This sounds like the end result of a party that I'm incredibly sad that I missed. She sounds like my kind of girl.


:spit: that is, if I had a beverage in my mouth when I read that.

Funny ****.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 6:37 pm 
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Apart from my "lady tried to swollow pessary" story.

We recently had a gentleman who was testing his blood glucose, apparently it was quite low. So instead of eating something, he decided the meters (yes he tested using 2 different branded meters) were wrong, and ended up needing a quick trip to the emergency department. Of course we got the slap on the wrist and must investigate the cause... if I ad a dollar for every time "user error" came up as a reason for these things >.<


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 6:46 pm 
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According to an ER nurse I know, the San Francisco General Hospital ER has tools for removing things as gently as possible from people's bums, and the objects they have removed include light bulbs, bottles, glasses, vegetables, and yes, gerbils.

I've been wondering if they have had to remove any of the new twisty fluorescent light bulbs yet.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 10:35 pm 
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Micheal wrote:
I've been wondering if they have had to remove any of the new twisty fluorescent light bulbs yet.

Lefty loosey, right?

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 10:58 pm 
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No, left.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 11:02 pm 
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Well this is a fun topic. Here's some more: http://regretfulmorning.com/2009/06/7-o ... -assholes/

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 11:55 pm 
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I have my sister to thank for introducing me to the best internet search ever.

A few highlights:
Image

Image

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Surgery was scheduled to remove the nail, but on the morning before surgery, the patient painlessly passed a 10-penny 8.3-cm steel nail while voiding.


Image

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 02, 2012 10:00 am 
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I found this interesting. With google, everyone thinks they are an expert. Nothing we don't know though.


http://abcnews.go.com/Health/study-half ... d=16908530


Spoiler:
Feeling lucky? A new study shows you might need it if you're "googling" medical advice instead of asking your doctor.

In a study of 1,300 Google search results related to infant sleep safety, researchers found that only 43.5 percent of websites provided accurate information. The rest were either inaccurate or irrelevant.

"It is important for health care providers to realize the extent to which parents may turn to the Internet for information about infant sleep safety and then act on that advice, regardless of the reliability of the source," said Dr. Rachel Moon, the pediatrician who led the research effort published in the Journal of Pediatrics.

Moon, a Sudden Infant Death Syndrome researcher at the Children's National Medical Center in Washington, D.C., used 13 search phrases related to infant sleep safety, including "infant sleep position," and "pacifier infant" to conduct her study. Moon and her team analyzed the first 100 Google results for each phrase, and deemed them accurate if they matched up-to-date recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics.

Moon's colleague, Brandi Joyner, told ABCNews.com she regularly tells patients to double-check their online sources' validity before acting on the advice. Joyner is clinical research coordinator at Children's National Medical Center and health educator at the Children's National WIC clinic in Washington, D.C., where she tells women how to keep their children safe even at naptime and bedtime.

"If you want to turn to the Internet, make sure the website is ending in .gov or.org or .state," Joyner said.

The most accurate sites were from government organizations, which were accurate 80.1 percent of the time, according to the study. Researchers found that the least accurate websites were blogs, which were only accurate 30.9 percent of the time.

A physician in Los Angeles, Dr. Frisca Yan-Go, said many of her patients come into her office under the impression that they can sleep in the same bed as their infants, which may result in suffocation. In fact, since many of her patients are Chinese, and Chinese culture includes co-bedding with children, she has to ward off misinformation from the Web and from her patients' upbringing.

"It's good to have the Internet, but wrong information or bad information is worse than no information," she said.

This BabySleepSite.com and BabyCenter.com both say babies can sleep on their stomachs when they have the ability to roll onto their bellies without help. However, the American Academy of Pediatrics says only "Supervised, awake tummy time is recommended" for babies up to one-year-old and "Always place your baby on his or her back for every sleep time."

Dr. Ari Brown, a pediatrician based in Austin, Texas, said sometimes Internet research can be helpful. Her patients' parents research symptoms and look for signs in their children that they otherwise might not think to share with the doctor if they hadn't read a health blog or article or advertisement beforehand.

"The flip side is that most parents don't fact check," she said.

Brown said she once had a parent tell her, "I read online that I shouldn't use diaper wipes when my daughter pees – only when she poops."

This, of course, is untrue.

"People read all kinds of stuff online," she said, adding that it can sometimes cause a lot of anxiety. "But information can be very powerful when it's good information."

But infant sleep safety is just one subject area that has inaccurate Web information, doctors say.

What if a patient finds a bump and reads online that it's probably a cyst, asked Dr. Andrew Carroll, a family physician in Arizona. That patient might not see a doctor, and find out months down the line that the bump was melanoma all along.

Carroll said many of his patients also come to his office with bogus health products they read about online. One such patient showed him a bottle of Metanx, which is intended to help with diabetic nerve damage pain, and asked if there was anything less expensive that she could take instead.

"'You can take a normal multivitamin,'" Carroll said, upon looking at the ingredients. The product wouldn't have hurt her, but it wouldn't have particularly helped either, he said.

He said he's also had patients approach him about ASEA water, which he tells them basically amounts to saline (salt water) and doesn't have any real health benefits.

"People Google stuff all the time," Carroll said. "That's OK if it prompts someone to come into the office. What we're concerned about is when people find inaccurate information on the internet and something could be potentially dangerous."

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