Aizle wrote:
So let me clarify my comment. I don't believe that there is social stigma around rape from a standpoint of people thinking that if a women gets raped, she deserved it or was dressed slutty an so had it coming, etc. Obviously I'm speaking from an overall societal standpoint. As Akin showed, there still are some idiots out there that have retarded opinions on rape.
Akin showed that there are people out there that have poor knowledge of the medical aspects of rape. He did not show that he, or anyone else, has a retarded
attitude towards rape. Anything in that regard has been stuff you have read into his comments.
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That said, there most certainly is some stigma around having been the victim and the embarrassment of having it happen to you. It's a deeply personal and private violation that no one is going to want to talk about. That is the silence that I believe still exists and that the various rape centers are trying to combat.
If by that you mean a self-imposed stigma or embarassment, then the rape centers are not trying to combat it, or if they are, then they don't have the least idea how to go about it effectively. They're creating it. What they need to do is
stop talking about silence and stigmas. Rape is a crime. If they want women to report it and deal with it like any other crime they need to stop telling them that there's this big silence and embarassment around it.
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So I take their comments especially on the splash page of their websites, to be doing everything they can to get women to talk to them and report it, because there are many people who don't report it. Further, I seem to recall a statistic that the majority of rape victims know the rapist, so you have the added issue of them coming forward impacting the women's environment beyond just the rapist.
In that case, they're a bunch of raging incompetents, which isn't surprising. The primary qualification to get involved in anything to do with rape is
having been raped, and these are the same people that were constantly told before they got raped that "you're going to ahve all this shame and embarassment and there's going to be silence" and so forth. Then they go right back and put the same nonsense out there. Wanting people to come forward and not be shamed into silence is laudable, but stop **** assuming that right from the get-go in your FAQ.
As to people knowing their attackers, that is a problem, but it needs to be addressed from that standpoint. Talking about generalized "fear" and "embarassment" and "shame" doesn't help deal with the consequences of reporting a family member or significant other. Those fears come from fears of specific consequences, and it's not just a matter of overcoming fear; it's a matter of being able to address those consequences. If a woman is afraid her boyfriend will stab her to death if she reports him, that's not an issue of "rape victims being shamed into silence", that needs to be addressed by looking at that situation and saying "ok, is this ******* at all likely to stab her to death, and if so, how can that be prevented within her life situation?"
Part of the thing with these people is that they still think there's some undercurrent of male privilege out there that they're dealing with which causes rape. That's where the "rape is about power and control" thing comes from and why male victims and female perpetrators are almost entirely ignored. That's why you see cutsey little programs that involve "Educating" men basically on 'no means no'. That isn't the problem; it is not a matter of "all men are potential rapists until they've been educated by the feminists". That's also why "rape is about power and control" is tautological. Duh. If it wasn't, it'd be consensual sex. However that's a silly thing to say. So is robbery. So is murder. Rape is about power and control over sex. Robbery is about power and control over property. Murder is about power and control over whether you live or not. Every time rape counselling and crisis places say "rape is not about sex" they contribute to the problem by making women less likely to properly identify a threat in time.