The Glade 4.0

So I have a kid in my third grade Sunday school class. He's the worst behaved child I've ever had. A lot of times, things turn into a battle of wills. I've been trying to choose my battles. I don't nit-pick him because I know it won't get me anywhere. But there are certain things I absolutely refuse to budge on.

I've tried talks with him. I've explained to him that I want him in my class. I've complimented him on how well he reads. I try to engage him in conversation that isn't related to the class. But he gets incredibly obstinate. Many times he seems like he's in his own little world. He's really good at ignoring people addressing him that sometimes you can't tell if he heard you or not. He's constantly pushing the boundaries.

It's to the point now where I spend a significant part of my time just monitoring him. I don't want to give up on him. But on the other hand, I have a dozen other kids I have to teach and I can't have him ruining my credibility and authority with the other kids. I spoke to a pastor about the behavior and he said things got so bad last year, he was suspended from the Sunday school for 6 months. At 2nd grade! He said it might come down to having to ask the mother (pretty sure the father isn't around) to stay in class for a month to supervise. I just don't want to resort to that. He said the kid has all the signs of abuse and that hey had reported the kid to CPS but nothing came to it. I don't know what the signs of abuse are, but I do know this kid's problems go beyond just being strong willed and being a child of a single mom. I've dealt with many of those boys before, and this is worse in ways I can't properly describe.

Not sure what to do. I keep praying for a break-through with this kid. I change up my approach. I'm just not sure what else to do that isn't giving up on him. Any of you teachers have advice?

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The Dude abides.

Have you tried making him your "special assistant"? It will build his self-esteem, keep him glued to your hip, and enable you to work with the rest of the class at the same time. Provided the child is not ADHD, this could be a feasible solution for you.
Just have him pass stuff out, sharpen pencils, etc. Invent stuff if you need to, just make sure that whatever it is its "important" and gives him the illusion of some control. Continue to offer positive reinforcement in the form of praise at every opportunity.
If the child is abused, this may be the one and only place where he does get any positive attention; he may be very needy.
Do your best, but be prepared for the idea that the boy may need more help than you can provide like counseling and a safer/more secure home environment before he is able to modify his behavior.
Consider asking a counselor or licensed therapist for advice as well.
Good luck and prayers your way. Giving up on a kid is never a good feeling; I pray that you won't have to.

*edit* PS---Even if you can't "fix" the situation, take heart; you should know that whatever kindness and love you show this child, your patience with him, and your good example may very well be something that he will remember fondly for the rest of his life. So everything you are doing, even if you do not see immediate results, may make all the difference in the world to this child.
I know. I was a troubled child in 3rd grade as well, and remember some love and kindness showed to me as well that carried me later in life when I thought I was worthless.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Oonagh as Foamy-----

Have the child look you in the eye. If he can not hold a gaze on you for more than 6 seconds he may have ADHD.

Emotinal abuse takes a lot of time to notice or figure out in a child. Sometimes yuo may never know unless you are exposed daily to them like I am.

Physical abuse, you may or may not see.

Sexual abuse a sign of that is wetting pants.

Do a reward system with the kid give him something to work for. I would use with younger children Bingo chips or pennies on the desk. Give him three pennies to start if he loses all three no reward. Do this for a few weeks and then knock down to two pennies and then one.
After you take a penny have him explain why he lost the penny. If he doesn't know explain it to him and then the following week, remind him if he does the same behavior again. he will eventually get. If he doesn't have severe ADHD.

Hope this may help

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This must be Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.