The Glade 4.0

Most definitely.

"I think the real question people should be asking themselves is why don't they spend longer on the pot?"
DeuceMaster 4:3

Archiving it on the quotes thread. (Which should also be stickied)

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

The Book of Screeling.

Initial book of the Bathroom Bible.

I can see that happening.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

On the "home court advantage":

I have no qualms about dropping a deuce at work. However, I always seem to get my two-flushers at work - never at home. I blame the crappy low flow toilets that the hippies who invariably wind up in the higher-up positions at colleges insist on for the environment. Nevermind that I live in St. Louis, where the only water flow problem we have is that there's too much of it and we frequently flood during the rainy season.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.

Out of all the cities on the country, St. Louis and it's meccha-like quasi intersection of culinary aspects should have the greatest sewage system of the world. We're talking like Greek Aqueduct levels of ahead of its time.

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"It's real, grew up in trife life, the times of white lines
The hype vice, murderous nighttimes and knife fights invite crimes" - Nasir Jones

I've never been in a private home or apartment that didn't have a sufficiently burly can. It's the business establishments that usually seem to have problems.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.

"sufficiently burly can"?

/blink blink

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Dream as if you'll live forever...
...Live as if you'll die tomorrow

Vivere Senza Rimpianti

Yes. See chapter 1 verse 4. Having a wussy toilet is like constantly having to remind a 5 year old to chew his food before he swallows. The first couple times you roll with it. After about 10, the extra effort is tiresome.

A "burly can" can take it all in one shot. On the off occasion that it does take two (pun intended), you have accomplished something mighty.

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The Dude abides.

My toilet has the capacity for an entire bucket of golf balls.

It is burly.

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Holy shitsnacks!

would I fall in and not be able to get out?

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Dream as if you'll live forever...
...Live as if you'll die tomorrow

Vivere Senza Rimpianti

It's not necessarily about how big the bowl is, it's how much power is generated by the water when you flush it.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.

To quote Tucker Max on hotel toliets:

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"It's real, grew up in trife life, the times of white lines
The hype vice, murderous nighttimes and knife fights invite crimes" - Nasir Jones

Nah, its a standard size, but it has a 4" trap (the hole in the bottom) and dumps its entire water load in like .5 seconds.

The only thing better was this one toilet at the office I used to work at. If you weren't careful, it would suck your soul away. That thing was a monster. There was nothing it couldn't handle.

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Holy shitsnacks!

Sounds like a challenge to me.

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"It's real, grew up in trife life, the times of white lines
The hype vice, murderous nighttimes and knife fights invite crimes" - Nasir Jones

I flushed a whole roll of toilet paper down that thing. The good stuff too, not that cheap *** paper that's one ply and flimsy enough for your finger to poke through.

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Holy shitsnacks!

What'd you do just stand over the toilet dropping stuff in and seeing if it would go down?? Heh.
Actually that sounds kind of fun.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Nah, I opened a new roll, and it fell in. Didn't want to fish it out, so I just flushed it.

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Holy shitsnacks!

like, roll and all? Jesus, your Toilet could consume Ghandi.

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It feels like all the people who want limited government really just want government limited to Republicans.
---The Daily Show

Yeh. It was pretty epic.

I always waited to flush after I got up after that.

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Holy shitsnacks!

God I hate that ****.

The campus with the good toilets built back in the '60s uses the paper that disintegrates before it reaches your ***.

The campus with the good paper has terrible toilets that couldn't flush the nasty half-liquid brown.

I can't **** win.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.

dude.. carry your own to the good toilet!

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Darksiege
Traveller, Calé, Whisperer
Lead me not into temptation; for I know a shortcut

That would work, on days when I'm there. Otherwise, it's a 15-minute drive to get to the campus with the good john.

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Buckle your pants or they might fall down.

makes me glad I have an aversion to public toilets. I make sh*tbreak from American Pie look normal.

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Darksiege
Traveller, Calé, Whisperer
Lead me not into temptation; for I know a shortcut

See, I don't understand this one either. My husband took the kids to go rent a movie and 20 min later I get a text "clear out the bathroom 911" So I'm all freaking out thinking one of the kids has diarrea or the stomach flu or something so I go and clean everything out of the bathroom. 5 minutes later, my husband runs in the door like he's being chased by a tiger, yelling get out of my way and makes a beeline for the bathroom. I'm standing there bewildered wondering what just happened and then all the kids bust out laughing talking about how dad had to poo and how he was honking his horn in traffic and dodging cars and yelling at the other drivers and the stoplights and stuff.
All that, just because he didn't want to use a public toilet. I mean, the man was willing to risk crapping in his pants, and willing to risk his life in traffic, JUST TO MAKE IT TO THE TOILET AT HOME.
Men. And their pooping habits. I may never understand.
DeuceMaster, you need to go ahead and just write the whole book.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

It comes down to the feeling of relief. That relief just wouldn't be as intense and gratifying if he'd gone in a public john. I bet you Nitefox walked out of the bathroom feeling like the king of more than just Burger King.

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The Dude abides.

Warning: TMI incoming

On the way home back from dinner out, (I was driving) I suddenly had the urge to go. Normally I can make it. The pressure builds, I withstand, and it subsides. This happens in waves and i can make it home in time for home field advantage.

This time, though, the pain and pressure were enormous and it would NOT subside. It was literally *right there* and it was coming. We were only halfway home and it was getting near closing time for most retail establishments. Knowing that if I didn't find a place to stop, we were going to have a mess to clean up in the car, I pulled into a strip mall and waddled into Bed, Bath and Beyond. I seriously did not think I was going to make it and if the mens room was out of order for any reason, I was headed into the ladies room. And perish the thought if the store was closed; I shudder to think of what would have happened then.

The moral of the story, well....I don't think there is a moral.

Anyway, public toilets are not always bad. I only avoid them if there is *obvious* reason to avoid them. Otherwise, game on.

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This must be Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.