The Glade 4.0

This is in reaction to a bad reaction I saw in real life recently.

For the record, whenever anyone here recommends counseling, they aren't saying you are a crazy person totally out of control. They are saying it sounds like you have some issues, and it might benefit you to talk to someone with professional training, someone who knows how to talk about those issues. Please understand that we here have a long record of recommending counseling to our on-line friends when we see, or think we see, that talking with someone would help. Many of us have been through the process and we wouldn't recommend it if we didn't think it would be useful.

There is also the selfish part. Better conversation comes when people aren't weirded/freaked/creeped out. You've probably figured out we like to talk around here.

The bad incident came at an IHOP, when what looked like a son (adult) telling his mother that he thought she needed to see a counselor, that she wasn't behaving normally. He was talking softly, trying to be reasonable, and the only reason I overheard was because they were in the booth next to me. Truth be told he could have worded it better, but it wasn't rude or a put-down, he was concerned. She went ballistic and threw her pancakes at him, syrup and all, and started screaming about how she wasn't crazy, she didn't need to see a shrink, etc. She convinced me he was right, the mom needed some counseling at the very least. She ran out to the car, he tried to clean up a little, paid his bill and went after his mother. He had the keys, she couldn't get in the car without him. My guess was that she probably would have left without him. All i could really do was look sympathetic.

The odd thing, the only thing that annoyed me was when the waitress came over and used the same couple sentences to apologize to everyone for the incident. They have a script for that situation?

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

That sucks.
Of course, the son could have picked a more private place....I think confronting your mom in a pancake house where everyone can hear what's going on is pretty insensitive. Not condoning her behavior, because she obviously needs professional help, but he was asking for a scene when he brought it up in public. These things should be discussed privately.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Maybe it's the pancakes...

Yeah, I definitely don't see therapy as something only a crazy person needs. There are many mental/emotional conditions that need to be treated and many of them a person cannot do on their own. It's like trying to use your willpower to wish away a physical ailment... as much as Peter Popoff would like you to believe, it can't be done.

When it's not medication, but just a person to talk to, the analogy is a lot more like a gym's personal trainer. Sure, you can maybe work out on your own. But you're not going to get as an effective a work out, or be knowledgeable enough to know the most effective techniques. Nor are most people self-motivated enough, and they need a second person for encouragement. It's the same thing with a therapist. They are there to help you retrain your brain in ways you aren't able to quite do on your own. If a therapist doesn't seem like they are helping much, it's more likely you need a better/different therapist than therapy isn't working for you.

I saw a therapist in my youth. I didn't like it much. It wasn't helpful for me. But, that was really mostly my fault. Because therapy only works if you are a willing participant and you actually want to get better. I did get better on my own. But it took years. I am sure that amount of time could have been sped up had I been more willing to work with my therapist.

While I never think the suggestion of seeing a therapist is overused..... I do think anti-depressants are certainly overprescribed. Especially where I live (there is a reason why a nearby county is called "Happy Valley"). Do some people legitimately need them? Absolutely. Serotonin deficiency is a very real condition. I know personally that they were not for me. Did they make me happy? Oh hell yes. But I felt like Ren wearing Stimpy's "Happy Helmet." It was over the top. Way over the top. And I could tell.

And one side effect I couldn't stand was that my "humor filter" would not work. I pride myself in the simple fact that I can make anyone laugh. It is the one thing I would say I have a true talent for. And one of those reasons is because I have a real-time filter going on during everything I say as it comes out of my mouth. My humor is never "uncalled for" for anyone I am around. Hell, when I say a cussword (even in excruciating pain or anger) it is not because I couldn't control it, it is because it went through my filter by I weighed the decision and deliberately picked and chose my words (many times I'll even censor myself under extreme conditions). But, on happy pills, this filter did not work very well. Some of my quick-witted responses were completely crass and offensive and it was only after the fact did I realize what I said.

Between those two things, I have learned that pills are not for everyone. But I certainly believe they are for SOME people. Just not MOST.

Anyway..... long story short..... therapy: not a bad thing to be offended over. If anything, if someone suggests it to you, it's because they care deeply for you and want to see you happy.

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Les Zombis et les Loups-Garous!

Better than therapy

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"Hysterical children shrieking about right-wing anything need to go sit in the corner and be quiet while the adults are talking."

I dunno about that, considering what happened...

Sorry DE, but the solution to every problem isn't a hammer.

The son in that example definately needed a little more tact, but depending on their family/living arrangements, it may be that was as private as he could find.

The solution to people who pick up plates of pancakes in IHOP and throw them because someone suggested they need therapy is a hammer. People like that need to have it beaten into them that such behavior won't be tolerated.

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"Hysterical children shrieking about right-wing anything need to go sit in the corner and be quiet while the adults are talking."

For some people, you are absolutely correct. However, there are plenty where that will be much like trying to teach a pig to sing. You'll waste your time and annoy the pig.

No no. Beatings are only to teach them that if they inflict violent craziness on others in public, there's more beatings to come.

There's no teaching involved. There's only stimulus-response.

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"Hysterical children shrieking about right-wing anything need to go sit in the corner and be quiet while the adults are talking."

If you try to teach a pig how to sing with a hammer, atleast you'll wind up with a shit-load of pork.

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Ezekiel 23:19-20 

Indeed.

If you're an alcoholic and I hit you with a cattle prod every time you reach for a drink - you won't be an alcoholic very **** long. You'll be a recovering alcoholic because AA will suddenly look very attractive compared to what I'm doing.

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"Hysterical children shrieking about right-wing anything need to go sit in the corner and be quiet while the adults are talking."

You should market that service :p

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Holy shitsnacks!