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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 3:26 pm 
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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 3:40 pm 
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Lex, I know Its hard to meet people, and finding people who truely care about you, but you need to lighten up and not be so clinical. Talk to someone because you want to, not because you have a quota to reach by the end of the day. They are people not numbers.

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Do ever want to just grab someone and say...WTF is wrong with you?


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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 3:49 pm 
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Kirra wrote:
Lex, I know Its hard to meet people, and finding people who truely care about you, but you need to lighten up and not be so clinical. Talk to someone because you want to, not because you have a quota to reach by the end of the day. They are people not numbers.


I do!! I love going out and talking to people! I also enjoy being clinical. If I didn't enjoy this stuff I wouldn't bother, but I really like it and look forward to it every day. When I'm out there talking I don't want to go home. It's not like "9 more approaches to go... blah..." And yes I get anxiety and have fear and get tired, but many activities can be like that.


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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 3:56 pm 
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Now these last few posts you have made sound more reasonable than any of the ones previous. Talk like this and act more like this..when you get all clinical and act like your analyzing everything is when things are odd.

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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 4:24 pm 
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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 5:36 pm 
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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 5:39 pm 
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This thread is now about Courage Wolf

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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 5:55 pm 
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PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 9:33 pm 
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Tonight I approached and talked to a group of four college girls sitting at a table. My opening was something about how I just saw them and wanted to approach four girls and make an idiot out of myself, but they made me repeat it three times and got distracted, so we talked about other stuff. I correctly guessed two of their nationalities (French and Filipina), and that made them really excited. The interaction lasted 5-10 minutes and we all seemed mutually entertained. It was fun. This is new territory! I felt at ease talking to them from the start, and I was able to maintain proper tonality of my speech (non-supplication). At the end before I left they were like "We like you!!"

2 Harvard girls spectated and seemed amused.

I'm definitely starting to man up!! Keep in mind that I used to be super shy.

Also some girls are starting to give me very obvious indicators of interest when I talk to them... however it's challenging for me to make them comfortable enough to actually hang out, even when I get phone numbers.

This hobby is starting to get fun... it's like when you're learning tennis and can finally hold a rally. I'm sure there's lots of guys who can naturally do this stuff but I have to learn it through lots of effort and great social humiliation.

edit: fixed paragraph structure


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 Post subject: Re: Talking to strangers
PostPosted: Tue May 11, 2010 8:24 am 
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PostPosted: Tue May 11, 2010 8:54 am 
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I think today will be total humiliation day. I'm going to walk up to many groups of people and introduce myself with nothing else to say, even if I'm tired. I want to get used to people tooling on me.

edit:

It's going to be fun!


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 Post subject: Re: Talking to strangers
PostPosted: Tue May 11, 2010 9:40 am 
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If you're in a fight and cannot escape, aren't you essentially forced to fight back as best you can? I think it's the same way in a conversation with the Others... if you plan on staying then you are forced to use your concept of the best mannerisms/words as a survival mechanism, because it can feel like a life or death situation. It's very interesting. And the more you do it, the better you get. I think the intensity only goes away when the other side is obviously supplicating (like a female giving indicators of interest, or a guy acting like your subordinate).

edit:

Ever since those 2 girls screamed at me for 5 minutes straight and I held my ground, I've been much more at ease in later interactions... which puts the Others at ease too.


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 Post subject: Re: Talking to strangers
PostPosted: Wed May 12, 2010 9:28 am 
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Last night I got 6 phone numbers.

I "worked from home" at a Starbucks. I talked to the employees and they said I'm allowed to chat with people if I'm polite. I waited by the line and talked to lots of people, and got 2 phone numbers. One is a date for this Thursday, unless she flakes. My opener was something dumb like "I'm getting pumpkin bread." Her [blushing] "Ok..." Me: "Just so you know", and then we playfully talked and then moved on to our backgrounds and such.

Eventually at night time I was talking to this cool homeless guy by the book store. A police officer walked by and stood next to me. The moment I left the homeless guy, the police officer took me into the bank. I was nervous and didn't know if he was mad I was talking to strangers, or if it was something else. He asked me about my background and I told him (and showed my employee badge). He explained to me how I looked clean cut and figured I wasn't homeless, and that it's dangerous to speak to Homeless people, and so on. We started talking about a whole range of things. I was awed by his confidence... of all the 500 or so strangers he was the most confident. I was sweating since he made me nervous and because I was trying to conceptualize him as an equal... and in my mind I emotionally really wanted to attack him... a fight or flight response. When he asked to shake my hand I said it's sweaty, and he asked if I'm nervous, and I said no I get like that with everyone. But he said he could tell because he's done this a lot... I asked if I'm awkwardly nervous and he laughed and said no. He's 50 and a police chief. At one point he emphasized some point and grabbed my arm, and I said "Dude that's bad *** how you grabbed my arm", to which he smiled. Eventually I buckled and thought of him as authority. We talked about confidence, and how I've been talking to tons of strangers every day and if that was alright. He said it's fine. He asked me if I'm a virgin, and I said no, and he asked me if I have a really low self-esteem. I laughed and said no, I have a normal one but just want a super high self-esteem. I explained how talking to tons of strangers builds confidence, and gets you lots of girls, and I told him about some of my successes. He was a really cool guy. He showed me pictures of his kids. His son is in the air force and going to Iraq. He showed me his daughter who was pretty cute, and I said I would talk to her if I met her, and he laughed and said "I bet you would." He wished me luck and said he hoped I get some pussy. He apologized for making me nervous but I said I'm happy he did, because it helps me. It was really fun talking to him.

Later that night, I was walking around with a cute girl I just met, and introduced her to him. I forgot her name and said "Claire" instead of "Rachel", which was slightly embarrassing, but turns out she has a boyfriend anyways.

I also got a girl's number on the sidewalk in the night time. That's difficult to do because you can easily come off as sketchy. She was waiting for her friend. We were laughing and stuff, and when I was putting her number in my phone I said I forgot her name because I get nervous with girls, and she said I'm doing pretty well.

On the subway train I was chewing on ice and tried talking to a girl, and eventually was like "I wish my mouth wasn't numb because then I could have convinced you to go out with me", and she laughed. She exited the train so I followed her and got her number, and told her she better be nice to me because I got out at the wrong stop.


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PostPosted: Wed May 12, 2010 1:29 pm 
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I'm on anti-psychotics/anxiety and mood stabilizers and I still feel mental... jeez. I was reading a book about BSD that my mom got me, and it said that it takes really long for the fight or flight mechanism to go away for bipolar people... so I constantly feel edgy and alert because I go through this every night.


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PostPosted: Wed May 12, 2010 4:39 pm 
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There's nothing wrong with approaching complete strangers and speaking with them. I do this all the time. Obviously, don't be a weirdo.

If you approach someone uninvited, and are dismissed, you should respect them enough to split. Not doing so will make you look dangerous, and could actually make them dangerous as a result.


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PostPosted: Wed May 12, 2010 9:44 pm 
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Arathain Kelvar wrote:
There's nothing wrong with approaching complete strangers and speaking with them. I do this all the time. Obviously, don't be a weirdo.

If you approach someone uninvited, and are dismissed, you should respect them enough to split. Not doing so will make you look dangerous, and could actually make them dangerous as a result.


Very good points. I don't plan on intentionally pissing people off again unless there is a great reason.

edit:

The last few hours are the first in the last three weeks where I feel mentally sane. This is because I hung out with friends instead of endlessly confronting strangers in Boston... so finally am able to relax a bit.


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PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 12:07 am 
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Things I want to try:

-Grabbing or slapping guys' arms to show them who's boss. And laughing about it to myself. I read on the Internet that you can usually get away with this, and I liked it when the police officer did it to me. Note: Don't test this on military guys. Also don't test in venues where I don't want to be kicked out of.

-Spin-kissing girls. It's where you twirl them around, dance style, and then go for the kiss. It's better then holding their hand and just pulling them close... although caveman style does have its benefits.

-More insta-dates instead of phone numbers

-Better things to mass text (where you send the same text message to 10+ people or so)

-Taking girls in the bookstore on "adventures" to the basement. Somehow I need to build enough comfort here.

-Night clubs/Bars.


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 Post subject: Re: Talking to strangers
PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 6:58 am 
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PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 7:40 am 
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Lex Luthor wrote:
Things I want to try:

-Grabbing or slapping guys' arms to show them who's boss. And laughing about it to myself. I read on the Internet that you can usually get away with this, and I liked it when the police officer did it to me. Note: Don't test this on military guys. Also don't test in venues where I don't want to be kicked out of.


Don't test this on pretty much anyone. You're going to get your *** kicked.

Quote:
-Spin-kissing girls. It's where you twirl them around, dance style, and then go for the kiss. It's better then holding their hand and just pulling them close... although caveman style does have its benefits.


If you start doing this with women you don't know, an *** kicking is in your near future.

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-More insta-dates instead of phone numbers


Right. :roll:

Quote:
-Taking girls in the bookstore on "adventures" to the basement. Somehow I need to build enough comfort here.


No, you need to not do this. You may as well hand a sign around your neck saying "I'm a **** nut case."

Quote:
-Night clubs/Bars.


You need to look at what you posted yourself. You feel mentally healthier hanging out with friends rather than going up to strangers acting like a **** wierdo.

Stop doing it.

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 Post subject: Re: Talking to strangers
PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 7:53 am 
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PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 7:58 am 
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LOL, I got 2 dates scheduled from the last time I went out. I'm not a total weirdo.

I'm trying to exterminate my social anxiety before I get depressed (might happen this winter), and that way I can still pick up girls while depressed.

edit:

Also since I got a good night's rest and don't feel too psychotic, I know that this amount of lithium is definitely keeping me in a daze... it's a weird feeling.


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PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 11:24 am 
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Lex,

You are either full of **** or you want your *** kicked.


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PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 12:42 pm 
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Arathain Kelvar wrote:
Lex,

You are either full of **** or you want your *** kicked.


I'll make things happen and post some stories. I'm not "full of ****".

I've already held girls' hands and pulled them towards me caveman-style, which was amusing.


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PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 12:55 pm 
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Plan for today/tonight:

-Meeting a girl for a date

-Straight shoulders the entire day/night, but relaxed

-NO FIDGETING the entire day/night no matter how itchy anything is

-No touching my face or hair.

-deep tonality every time I speak

-don't care too much about approaching other girls while waiting for the date, as long as I can handle not fidgeting and having a straight back

-don't even care about touching the girl i'm seeing as long as I can maintain all the proper body language, because this is challenging enough.


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PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 1:07 pm 
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I think you should start posting videos of this body language stuff so the hot girls here can critique you.

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