The Glade 4.0

1.) Do you believe there are regrets, or just lessons learned?

2.) Should (metaphorical) bridges be burned, or should a chance to go back always be kept open?

3.) Do you believe that it is possible to change someone's first impression of you?

4.) If someone is being abused and they keep staying with/going back to the abuser, who then is really the abuser?

5.) Do reformed addicts ever fully remove their desire for the source of their addiction, or is the addiction always with them, just suppressed?

6.) If you were given the opportunity to change yourself at will into a dog or a cat, which would you choose? Why?

7.) Can you love someone too much?

8.) Does the expression "It's a Man's World" really hold true, or is the inequality more of a social perception?

9.) Is Jingo-ism an inevitability for a superpower nation?

10.) Taking into account the ups and downs, is life worth living?

1.) Do you believe there are regrets, or just lessons learned?

Both.

2.) Should (metaphorical) bridges be burned, or should a chance to go back always be kept open?

Some bridges need to be burned.

3.) Do you believe that it is possible to change someone's first impression of you?

Yes.

4.) If someone is being abused and they keep staying with/going back to the abuser, who then is really the abuser?

The abused is ALWAYS the victim. If they keep going back it's because they need help (mental help) to break the cycle.

5.) Do reformed addicts ever fully remove their desire for the source of their addiction, or is the addiction always with them, just suppressed?

No idea.

6.) If you were given the opportunity to change yourself at will into a dog or a cat, which would you choose? Why?

Dog. Cats are delicious but otherwise all-around awful creatures.

7.) Can you love someone too much?

Yes.

8.) Does the expression "It's a Man's World" really hold true, or is the inequality more of a social perception?

No it does not hold true. It is a modern myth.

9.) Is Jingo-ism an inevitability for a superpower nation?

Yes. A portion of any population (regardless of superpower status) will always be jingoistic.

10.) Taking into account the ups and downs, is life worth living?

It beats the alternative.

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1.) Do you believe there are regrets, or just lessons learned?

Both, but more of the latter than the former.

2.) Should (metaphorical) bridges be burned, or should a chance to go back always be kept open?

If someone wrongs me, bridges are burned. There is nothing they can do, short of traveling back in time and not doing it, would fix it.(And if they did go back in time to fix it they never would have went back in time to not do it, so they'll end up doing it anyway and the universe ends because paradoxes are bad)

3.) Do you believe that it is possible to change someone's first impression of you?

Yes. For example, I used to hate Taly so much. Like a lot. Back on the original Glade. Now she's one of my favorite people here.

4.) If someone is being abused and they keep staying with/going back to the abuser, who then is really the abuser?

I don't care enough about this to have an opinion.

5.) Do reformed addicts ever fully remove their desire for the source of their addiction, or is the addiction always with them, just suppressed?

An addict will always be an addict. Just like a criminal will always be a criminal. A rapist will always be a rapist and a murderer will always be a murderer.

6.) If you were given the opportunity to change yourself at will into a dog or a cat, which would you choose? Why?

Dog. Because dogs are way cooler than cats.

7.) Can you love someone too much?

I dunno.

8.) Does the expression "It's a Man's World" really hold true, or is the inequality more of a social perception?

It does not hold true. It is a load of horse **** that some women use to get special treatment.

9.) Is Jingo-ism an inevitability for a superpower nation?

I don't even know what this means.

10.) Taking into account the ups and downs, is life worth living?

Of course.

_________________
Los Angeles Kings 2014 Stanley Cup Champions

"I love this **** team right here."
-Jonathan Quick

Some people have regrets, so they do exist.



It's usually best to keep the bridge unburned. In practice, I napalm every bridge I find. Sometimes when I'm still on the bridge.



You can't change the first impression unless you invent a time machine. You can change their perception of you, though.



The original aforementioned abuser.



It's usually redirected onto something else.



Neither. I rather like opposable thumbs, and don't like the prospect of licking my own butt.



Depends on the individuals involved - they are the ones who can define the "too much" part.



Depends on the individuals involved. In my personal experiences, the genders are pretty even. The world's a big place; I'm sure I can find somewhere they are not.



My family used to play bingo on Christmas Eve.



Totally.

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1.) Do you believe there are regrets, or just lessons learned?
Is this like believing in the tooth fairy? I don't have regrets because I like the person I am and would not be this person with this life without some of my admittedly poor choices.

2.) Should (metaphorical) bridges be burned, or should a chance to go back always be kept open?
I don't burn bridges. This isn't because I have any plan to go back ever, I just see no reason to leave destruction in my wake. Why would I waste the effort?

3.) Do you believe that it is possible to change someone's first impression of you?
Don't much care, but I'd say yes. Over time.

4.) If someone is being abused and they keep staying with/going back to the abuser, who then is really the abuser?
Don't blame the victim. The worst part of abuse is often the feeling of deserving it.

5.) Do reformed addicts ever fully remove their desire for the source of their addiction, or is the addiction always with them, just suppressed?
I have no clue.

6.) If you were given the opportunity to change yourself at will into a dog or a cat, which would you choose? Why?
Cat please. Specifically one of MY cats. They get avocado and venison cat food and lots of skritchies.

7.) Can you love someone too much?
The love itself is never the problem, it's the behaviours one blames on it.

8.) Does the expression "It's a Man's World" really hold true, or is the inequality more of a social perception?
I'm not sure what you're asking... it's still a man's world precisely because of social perception.

9.) Is Jingo-ism an inevitability for a superpower nation?
Not if the citizens are educated and feel secure in their rights. It's possible to love something without hating everything else.

10.) Taking into account the ups and downs, is life worth living?
Actually, yes, I quite like life. The alternative sucks.

1.) Do you believe there are regrets, or just lessons learned?
Lessons learned.

2.) Should (metaphorical) bridges be burned, or should a chance to go back always be kept open?
Fire cleanses.

3.) Do you believe that it is possible to change someone's first impression of you?
Nope.

4.) If someone is being abused and they keep staying with/going back to the abuser, who then is really the abuser?
The abused may also be an abuser, but that doesn't detract from the fact that the abuser is always the abuser.

5.) Do reformed addicts ever fully remove their desire for the source of their addiction, or is the addiction always with them, just suppressed?
Once an addict, always an addict. Doesn't mean they still do the deed though.

6.) If you were given the opportunity to change yourself at will into a dog or a cat, which would you choose? Why?
Dog, 'cause I like dogs better.

7.) Can you love someone too much?
Nope.

8.) Does the expression "It's a Man's World" really hold true, or is the inequality more of a social perception?
In the final analysis, all we can do is see the world through our own eyes. I do know some choose to blame others for what they can't achieve on their own.

9.) Is Jingo-ism an inevitability for a superpower nation?
No.

10.) Taking into account the ups and downs, is life worth living?
It beats the alternative, and I'm having a great ride.

_________________
In time, this too shall pass.

1.) Do you believe there are regrets, or just lessons learned?
Both.

2.) Should (metaphorical) bridges be burned, or should a chance to go back always be kept open?
Should they be? No. Are they at times? Yes. Sometimes intentional, sometimes not.

3.) Do you believe that it is possible to change someone's first impression of you?
Eh, yes, but it's rare and takes a lot of work.

4.) If someone is being abused and they keep staying with/going back to the abuser, who then is really the abuser?
You've heard the phrase "there are no stupid questions, only stupid answers?" It's wrong. This is a stupid question. The abuser is the abuser. The abusee may be an idiot, or have some psychological issue that needs to be corrected in order to recognize that he/she is in an unhealthy relationship. But the abuser is still the damned abuser.

5.) Do reformed addicts ever fully remove their desire for the source of their addiction, or is the addiction always with them, just suppressed?
Dunno. Probably always there.

6.) If you were given the opportunity to change yourself at will into a dog or a cat, which would you choose? Why?
A dog, I guess? I don't know.

7.) Can you love someone too much?
No.

8.) Does the expression "It's a Man's World" really hold true, or is the inequality more of a social perception?
Yes.

9.) Is Jingoism an inevitability for a superpower nation?
I think it an inevitability for any nation.

10.) Taking into account the ups and downs, is life worth living?
Life is always worth living. If you don't think so, the answer isn't death. It's to get off your *** and change your life.

1.) Do you believe there are regrets, or just lessons learned?

Regrets exist, most of them are a form of self torture for what cannot be changed. Lessons learned are better mentally.

2.) Should (metaphorical) bridges be burned, or should a chance to go back always be kept open?

Some bridges need to be burned, should be rare that you do that on purpose though.

3.) Do you believe that it is possible to change someone's first impression of you?

You can change the current perception, the first will always be back there lurking, waiting for a reason to reassert itself.

4.) If someone is being abused and they keep staying with/going back to the abuser, who then is really the abuser?

/agree Taamar

5.) Do reformed addicts ever fully remove their desire for the source of their addiction, or is the addiction always with them, just suppressed?

The proper term, recognizing the problem, is addict in recovery. Addicts do not reform, it is never over. They can be healthy people in recovery for the rest of their lives though.

6.) If you were given the opportunity to change yourself at will into a dog or a cat, which would you choose? Why?

Temporarily? Cat. Permanently? Neither, I'll stay human thank you. The cat is more mobile, can escape situations more efficiently, only reason.

7.) Can you love someone too much?

These days I wonder if I will ever love anyone again - other than my daughter and we aren't talking about unconditional parental love here.

8.) Does the expression "It's a Man's World" really hold true, or is the inequality more of a social perception?

Here in the United States, in some places, in some fields, for some people, the phenomenon still exists. For the most part I think we're growing past that, I hope so. In a bunch of other countries it exists in ways that horrify us.

9.) Is Jingo-ism an inevitability for a superpower nation?

Jingoism is defined in the Oxford English Dictionary as "extreme patriotism in the form of aggressive foreign policy". In practice, it refers to the advocation of the use of threats or actual force against other countries in order to safeguard what they perceive as their country's national interests, and colloquially to excessive bias in judging one's own country as superior to others – an extreme type of nationalism.

So, yes, to be a superpower you wield the big stick, even if you never hit anyone with it, or do so rarely. To do otherwise is to invite attack. Being the big dog in the yard brings responsibility. With time you learn to modify behavior, so that you aren't attacking everyone, and are supporting those closest to you politically, or you get taken down. The USA is in the process of letting itself be taken down, will we recover in time to stop it? I don't know yet.

10.) Taking into account the ups and downs, is life worth living?

Yes, without a moment's hesitation.

_________________
The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

1.) Lessons learned.
2.) Depends who the bridge is connected to.
3.) I hope so.
4.) The person doing the abusing. Just because the victim is stupid, doesn't make them the abuser. It's also psychological, being drawn back to people like that.
5.) Addictions never disappear.
6.) Dog. Because, **** cats.
7.) Love too much? I'm not sure what that means.
8.) Equality is a flawed idea.
9.) Inevitable for an uneducated nation.
10.) No doubt.

Interesting . . .

EDIT:


Perfectly fine question. Think about it. If a person continually goes back to an abusive situation, then the "victim" is practicing self-abuse, thus becoming the true abuser.

yes.



Burn the ones that need burning. Keep the ones that don't.



It is, but it's tough. Primacy is a tough thing to get past.



The abuser. Abuse victims generally begin the cycle of abuse with the abuser having worn down their self image and self esteem to the point where they don't really know where to turn, nor do they feel worthy of anything better. It's like brainwashing via battery. When dealing with a victim of abuse, you can't think of them as rational human beings. They are ill and need help.



For my part, every time I walk by someone smoking I want a cigarette. It's an act of will every time.



Cat. Better armed.



Yes.



It is still, without a doubt, a Man's world. The more that changes, the crazier men will get.



Probably.



Absolutely. Especially with the only realistic alternative of oblivion.

_________________


It feels like all the people who want limited government really just want government limited to Republicans.
---The Daily Show

If you ever mouth **** like that again I will hunt you down and beat the **** piss out of you. *******.

_________________

I can't tell if that post was supposed to be a joke or not. God damn you internet!

_________________
Los Angeles Kings 2014 Stanley Cup Champions

"I love this **** team right here."
-Jonathan Quick

Why all the H8? You deny that someone continually going back to an abusive relationship is not abusing themselves?

Rodahn, you just stepped into a huge pile of poo that I don't think you understand much about. There are so many factors at work in the range of abusive relations that your simple logic is misplaced and offensive in ways I don't think you understand. I hope you don't understand them, because the words you used are the words of an abuser, akin to "if the ***** didn't like it/want it she wouldn't keep coming back." In the last few years I remember several abusive relationships making the paper where the abusee finally got up the courage to leave her abuser and the abuser showed up at her place of employment and blew them both away, sometimes with collateral damage. Here in Sacramento we have a group called "Women Escaping A Violent Environment" (WEAVE - http://www.weaveinc.org/) that has safe houses no one outside the organization (and the women and children they help) knows the location of. WEAVE serves a lot of women and their children every year because so many guys out there are dangerous abusers.

It isn't a joke, it isn't funny, it is something you should do some research on before you say something like that again.


Hopwin, keep the name-calling in Hellfire, and if you ever threaten to do physical damage to someone on these forums again you will receive a cooling off temporary banning. You have been warned.

_________________
The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

I don't think Rodahn needed to be answered in the mod voice here. His opinion may be poorly reasoned and ignorant, but we don't have a rule against poor reasoning and ignorance. If we did, no one here would have a post count over 7. I think the mod voice was appropriately used in response to Hopwin, however.

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Ezekiel 23:19-20 

Micheal, I can assure you that making light of abuse was not my intention, and my apologies if it was interpreted that way.

I was just asking a question out of sheer curiosity and interest in what others thought, and in turn expressed my opinion.

Rynar, you may have a point. I will admit I have a personal and emotional knee-jerk disgust response on any support of abusers, no matter how flippant or humor intended it may appear to be. I went back and un-mod voiced the reaction to Rodahn. I do understand why Hopwin reacted as he did and while I wasn't able to ignore the threats of violence, I do consider his emotional response only slightly out of hand.

Rodahn, it isn't just making light of the topic, it is supporting abuse by saying the victim wanted it or wouldn't be coming back. There is some of that in the world, but it is a very small percentage of abuse cases. Rather than go into all the permutations possible, I'll just say your comment is naive and very selective in the abuse it refers to. It also touches in a nasty way on what I do for a living. Abuse runs rampant among the addicted and mentally ill. I understand (now) you meant it as a funny, but it really is a lightning rod of a comment that will attract a lot of emotional energy. It is like wearing a white sheet and waving the Stars and Bars in front of a civil rights convention. You are going to get severe negative reactions no matter what your intent.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

Micheal, you misunderstand my previous comment, I wasn't trying to be funny. I wasn't making light of it. I also was not saying that the victim wanted to come back. I was saying that there comes a point when a victim has to stop the cycle themselves, which means severing that relationship. I don't know how to make it any clearer.

EDIT: Also, just to clarify, I do not in any way support abuse.

Then hopefully sir, you are very naive on this topic. While that may seem logical to you, and in some cases it is a possibility, there are cases where the abused cannot leave and doesn't know how to get help. Consider shut-in elder abuse, consider child abuse, especially small child abuse. Consider the abuser who tells the abused that he (or she) will kill them, their children or others that they care about if the abused leaves. Most of the abused don't have the knowledge base to respond intelligently, and the abuser strives to keep them that way. Fear is the big key to keep the abused in line.

This is one of the most complex issues I can think of. Your comment is naive and does support abuse, whether you realize it or not.

This is not all about one on one sexual predator type abuse. Abuse is a whole spectrum of situations.

There is no one easy answer. Courage is a not a universal trait in humans.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

/shrug Perhaps I am naive. But that kind of comes back to my original point, in that I think more victims should find a way to summon the courage to break the cycle. Find safehouses, go to those in positions of authority for protection, etc.

It may be wishful thinking, but it's something I would like to see happen.

Really? Do you honestly think that anyone participating in this thread wouldn't like to see that happen?

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Ezekiel 23:19-20 

No.

Just...no.

No, I don't deny that. Without a doubt, they are seeking the abuse because they feel they deserve it. Like I said, people that are in an abusive relationship are not rational. They are sick and they need help. They go back to it because the person that kicks them around beats them into submission. They cut off their friends and family. They cripple the psychological tools used to overcome those situations. It's **** insidious.

Not trying to hate on you, mind you. Just tossing that out there. Some folks with very high levels of emotional and psychological resilience can climb out of such a situation. However, that resilience is more or less established at an early age, and if it doesn't exist, the ability to break free is very limited.

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It feels like all the people who want limited government really just want government limited to Republicans.
---The Daily Show

The most dangerous time for an abuse victim is when they get up the courage to end the abuse.

If you put a frog into water and raise the temperature slowly enough, it will let you boil it to death.

One of the key tools in an abuser's playbook is isolation.

If you know someone who is being isolated or whose significant other tends to intimidate them, be extra mindful to try to offer them safe haven and human contact.

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Once, I was a ranger
Then, I was a warlock
And a mage
And a paladin
Now, I seek to be myself