The Glade 4.0

Through my extensive research, I have concluded that Pirates are indeed awesomer than Ninjas.

My testing has included the use of Scribblenauts and the sandbox intro mode.

While standing a safe distance away wearing my shades and robe and wielding a lasersword for protection, I dropped a Ninja and a Pirate into the world. The pirate dispatched the Ninja 90% of the time. Each experiment was done with a freshly drawn Ninja and Pirate so the wounds did not carry over from their previous battles.

My work here is done.

_________________
This must be Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.

Did you inform the ninja before the drop that they were to eliminate the pirate?

Ninjas kill only when ordered to do so. Their lives belong to their master and should he decide to expend them to prove a point, they obey, mostly.

Pirates, on the other non-hooked hand, are so socially degenerate, they will kill their own mates to advance in line to the privy.

I suspect your study is flawed.

_________________
The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

Yeah, and pirates are so stupid that they sometimes attack French warships thinking they are cargo ships and get thier a$$ kicked.

Study is flawed. If said ninja were real, he wouldn't be confined by the DS and would promptly chop your head off before the pirate could even hit the ground.

I think the most damning condemnation of pirates is that they got their asses kicked by the French.

Somali Pirates aren't real pirates! They're pretenders!

_________________
Well Ali Baba had them forty thieves, Scheherezade had a thousand tales
But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves you got a brand of magic never fails...
...Mister Aladdin, sir, What will your pleasure be?
Let me take your order, Jot it down -You ain't never had a friend like me
█ ♣ █

While I make no commentary on the conclusion of your study, Foamy, I feel obligated to point out that your methodology is flawed.

The notion of drawing (thus, "scribbling") a ninja is anathema. How can you draw that which you cannot see? It follows, logically, that any ninja that is thus portrayed in illustration or photography is not, in truth, a ninja, but merely a fanciful interpretation of what a ninja is assumed to be. A pretender. A farce, if you will.

It should not surprise you that such an imitation, with no vetting or credentials whatsoever, should fare poorly in combat with a pirate.

_________________
"Aaaah! Emotions are weird!" - Amdee
"... Mirrorshades prevent the forces of normalcy from realizing that one is crazed and possibly dangerous. They are the symbol of the sun-staring visionary, the biker, the rocker, the policeman, and similar outlaws." - Bruce Sterling, preface to Mirrorshades

lol

This is pretty sound. Also, Lumberjacks would destroy either Pirates or Ninjas. As evidence, I present the Denny's Lumberjack Grand Slam. If you eat one of these, you will feel the pain of a dull axe being swung a cleaving blow to your gut. And Lumberjacks eat this **** every day for breakfast. It speaks volumes about their fortitude. Plus, many Lumberjacks practice Combat Sambo and fight Grizzly Bears for sport. Or maybe that's Zangief. I can't be bothered to look it up.

_________________
"It's real, grew up in trife life, the times of white lines
The hype vice, murderous nighttimes and knife fights invite crimes" - Nasir Jones

Rodahn, we'll have to take that captive back to headquarters, for questioning, yeah, for questioning. Subdue and disarm her.

A ninja in heels?

_________________
The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

/agree

And they are . . . stiletto heels (get it? stiletto? ninja?)

As a counter-argument...

[youtube]5zey8567bcg[/youtube]

Since you won't bother constructing an actual point, I'll just you you read Kaffis' words and you can replace the word "Ninja" with "Lumberjack" and create the correct words for yourself. In fact, please don't share your whatever you come up with, we don't have any room left on the refridgerator.

(We do, but we just tell him there isn't any)

_________________
"It's real, grew up in trife life, the times of white lines
The hype vice, murderous nighttimes and knife fights invite crimes" - Nasir Jones

Yarr!

_________________
"I've got twenty ways to tell you shut the f*ck up / nineteen of them are twenty-four bars long / the other one goes: SHUT THE F*CK UP" - Aesop Rock
"There is no God higher than truth." -- Gandhi
Formerly: Tulamian

Hot Pirate Babes (.com)

NSFW:

_________________
Go back to zero, take a pill, and get well ~ Lemmy Kilmister

The ninja bias here is deafening. I blame the blatant East Wing Media for this.

Clearly, lusty pirate wenches > *.

_________________

Holy shitsnacks!

PIRATES

Your cause has no chance against opponents like these:

(NWS)

Yes, and if it weren't for the French you'd be speaking Cherokee right now. 18th century France != 21st Century France. The more you knooooooow.....


Edit: Ah, you speak of Somali pirates. Not the same thing.

_________________
Les Zombis et les Loups-Garous!

Someone should probably mark this thread NSFW in the title.

_________________
"It's real, grew up in trife life, the times of white lines
The hype vice, murderous nighttimes and knife fights invite crimes" - Nasir Jones

/agree

_________________
Go back to zero, take a pill, and get well ~ Lemmy Kilmister

Done.

_________________
The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones

I'm pretty sure this thread has shown that in the endless cosmic struggle between pirates and ninjas, the winner is... us.

Claiming Somali pirates qualify as pirates obligates the ninja side to accept Steven Segal, Jackie Chan, Jet Li, Vin Diesel, and the Kung Fu Panda as ninjas.

_________________
"Hysterical children shrieking about right-wing anything need to go sit in the corner and be quiet while the adults are talking."

True and win.