The Glade 4.0

Heheh, I thought so too, but my wife didn't put the lid down when she was done for years (and still occasionally doesn't). I was able to make progress on that front by telling her our dog (who loves to lick faces) had been drinking out of said open toilet just prior to licking her face...

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"Dress cops up as soldiers, give them military equipment, train them in military tactics, tell them they’re fighting a ‘war,’ and the consequences are predictable." —Radley Balko

Our urethra is half an inch long and our bladders are tiny, and after childbirth our ability to hold is pretty pathetic... half the time I can barely get my pants down in time. Ever watched a woman try to do the knees-together peepee dance squeeze while trying to get out of tight pants?

we don't stand on the toil seat and squat over it either...

Frequently...my wife likes to wait until it's reached emergency state at least 4 times a week...

This difference between "Hey, is that my bladder? Maybe I should go.." and "OMG, must not pee on self!" is shorter than the distance between couch and toilet.

I actually knew this, and I forget where I heard it but it was years and years ago. I take measures to remedy the issue.

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“Strong people are harder to kill than weak people, and more useful in general”. - Mark Rippetoe

I would, but I doubt I could hold a squat for 20 minutes.

I think that's kinda the point....if you were a squatter instead of a sitter, you wouldn't need 20 minutes.

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

Nev, unless your toilet lid has some sort of airtight seal, you still get fecal aerosolization with each flush, right?

I think if you squatted each and every time, holding a squat wouldn't be a big problem. Plus, a lot of people in less developed countries squat instead of sit in general and not just to go to the bathroom.

As to the question of the Gender Toilet Seat Wars, I've worked primarily with women for 20 years...I'm quite well trained to leave the seat down. I guess guys always check the seat if they gotta sit, because it's a a bit of a special occasion (especially for Screeling!). Most guys can't understand not checking the toilet seat position each and every time; it's Basic Safety, just like you check to see if a gun is loaded before you mess with it.

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Women are from Hoboken, men are from Trenton. ~ Jimmy Kimmel

In the middle of the night when groggy and not wearing glasses the only way to check is to feel for it. That means I'm going to put my hand in whatever sprinkling is on the rim if the seat isn't down. If I spend the extra time to turn on the light and get my glasses on I'm telling my body that it's wake-up time and I'm not going to get back to sleep. I get up to pee twice a night, turning the light on (or putting my hand in rim pee) could lose me 2 hours of sleep nightly.

Not an actual issue in this house, Shel was raised by a single mother. The only time we have seat issues is when we have guests... a few months back one of my friends closed the lid and I had the lovely experience of peeing on a toilet lid in the dark.

Silly female... we don't spend 20+ minutes in the bathroom because we need to.

While feeling for the seat, you feel up, not down. Hence no sprinkling. There's either one, or two seats there. And if you're not sure if there are one or two, total, why are you in the dark in a strange bathroom?

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"Aaaah! Emotions are weird!" - Amdee
"... Mirrorshades prevent the forces of normalcy from realizing that one is crazed and possibly dangerous. They are the symbol of the sun-staring visionary, the biker, the rocker, the policeman, and similar outlaws." - Bruce Sterling, preface to Mirrorshades

So feel for the splashback surface....

Ah....true....that is the only place you have any respite from us nagging womenfolk....

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"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Jesus of Nazareth

You're kinder than I am.... I like to start meaningful conversation with Shel while he's on the throne. And I stare at him, just to mess with his head.

If the bathroom has his and her sinks.. just pee in her sink. And let her know you will stop when she remembers to check the seat.*

*this is simple internet big bad man talk, I am not stupid enough to try this IRL. I like being allowed to sleep in my own bed.

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Darksiege
Traveller, Calé, Whisperer
Lead me not into temptation; for I know a shortcut

Hey Shel, would you start peeing in the sink? The height seems better anyway. I would, but my *** doesn't fit on the counter and the faucet pokes my back.

Don't answer that...

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Darksiege
Traveller, Calé, Whisperer
Lead me not into temptation; for I know a shortcut

Hmm...actually, i didn't even think about that being a serious problem? I just thought it was a forgetfulness thing. My apologies.

Other than that, all I can really say is: Kegels. Lots of Kegels. Improves sex, too.




Man...yeah, I understand this, but it isn't about elimination of the aerosolized feces, it's about reduction

Feces is everywhere, and there ain't sh*t you can do about it! It's disgusting if you think about it...but yeah, you can reduce. REDUCE THAT FILTHY M***ERF***ER UNTIL ITS NO MORE.


Seriously, though...as far as squatting, I'm not sure i'd feel very comfortable, but I can see how it'd be useful. I'm pretty healthy, and I don't take that long, and don't have any problems with stuck feces. This thread...wow...I feel so, degraded.

I guess I really don't understand the dudes that go to the bathroom for 20 minutes and read the paper the whole time. Sh*t or get off the pot, I say. People that take that long...I don't get it at all...maybe it's a diet problem or health problem. I honestly don't get it. It's a stinky room. Take a sh*t and get the hell out so you can live your life!!!!

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Ron Paul 2012

I'll occasionally take my book to the bathroom at work so I can read a few pages without that lurking feeling that someone's gonna pop into my cubicle at any moment and ask me something like "what do you think we're paying you for?".

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Go back to zero, take a pill, and get well ~ Lemmy Kilmister

How does a guy **** in the woods? Dig a hole and squat. First time I did it, I wasn't quite sure how it was gonna work, but it came out OK. It's kind of a primal thing, really.

re: Flushing - I once heard a microbiologist (?) characterize toilet flushing as "little coliform explosions." There's an image for you, Nev.

"Think I'll go squat now." No, doesn't have quite the same ring to it as "I'm gonna go sit in the can."

Can't believe I'm posting in this thread. The Internet is dead, obviously.

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This cold and dark tormented hell
Is all I`ll ever know
So when you get to heaven
May the devil be the judge

I've heard it referred to as popping a squat.

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Interesting. I've heard of copping a squat (kind of like copping a feel or a plea), but never popping one.

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Go back to zero, take a pill, and get well ~ Lemmy Kilmister

According to UD they are synonyms:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.p ... 0a%20squat

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.p ... op+a+squat

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Yeah, I mean, popping a squat would be painful. I think that happens to those Olympic weightlifters...

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Ron Paul 2012

I always heard "pop a squat" as well.