The Glade 4.0

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 28, 2010 10:13 pm 
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Deuce Master

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I still get chills of horror looking at this. The pain was horrible. I made sounds like a dolphin giving birth.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 28, 2010 10:51 pm 
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Bull Moose
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He who lives by the deuce, dies by the deuce. Happy you survived the surgery.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 28, 2010 11:48 pm 
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Look on the bright side. You are probably now conclusively convinced you're not homosexual.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 12:27 am 
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Mountain Man
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OK, cool, picture, but ... WTF is the picture frame doing there?!

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 1:18 am 
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Bull Moose
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Mirror.

Do you really want to know?

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 Post subject: Re: Hemorrhoids
PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 2:13 am 
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Bru's Sweetie

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Just what does a dolphin giving birth sound like?? Oh, and those tools scared you??? Sheesh!! I've been through worse! Men are such wusses!! :mrgreen:

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"Fill your hand you son of a *****!"


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 3:02 am 
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Bull Moose
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You've given birth Jasmy, trumps anything I've ever been through. And yes, we are wusses, go ahead and put a bullet through our brains, but stay away from our asses with that stuff.

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The U. S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself. B. Franklin

"A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone." -- Tyrion Lannister, A Game of Thrones


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 6:40 am 
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Irish Princess
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Hope your anal health returns back to normal :)

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 8:33 am 
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Bah, that's nothing. Try walking into a room to see some machine, with a camera, and a monitor, and about 800 feet of whatever the hell it is to send the camera up your ***. And lube. Lots. And lots. And lots. Of lube.

And guess what? All that lube? It's not enough.

I suppose that if there is an upside to the next time my *** goes on candid camera, they're actually going to put me under.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 9:07 am 
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Home of the Whopper
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Dang. Glad that's over. Hope your butt feels better soon.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 9:25 am 
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Deuce Master

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Well, pooping still hurts, but somewhat less so. Last night was the first time without blood. I'm guessing this is going to take a while. He didn't cut em out, he banded them. The way he describes it, its kinda like strangling it until it deflates and retracts back upward.

Anyway, he said I had two right next to each other, one of which was about as big as a thumb.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 9:29 am 
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Irish Princess
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I think you deserve some vicodin for having a thumb up your butt constantly...;)

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 9:44 am 
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Deuce Master

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If I were a James Bond villain, would I be ButtFinger?

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 10:30 am 
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Home of the Whopper
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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 11:59 am 
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Deuce Master

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Were you saving that for just the right moment or did you just go google that right now?

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 12:01 pm 
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Heh. I actually do have a list of things that are marked in my favorites and waiting for the right occasion to come up to use them, but I also love google searching for just the right thing and can usually find what I want in about 60 seconds.
This one was googled.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 3:02 pm 
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Mountain Man
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Micheal wrote:
Mirror.

Do you really want to know?

Way TMI, Micheal. That's a little weird. :D

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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 9:42 am 
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Deuce Master

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So I still have some pain. Not as bad as it was, but its still there. There's no more bleeding at least. He mentioned there were a couple other hemorrhoids in there, but he went for the biggest one and one other that happened to be right next to it. I'm thinking I might have to go in again for this. My only hope is that it doesn't hurt near as much but I'm kinda doubting it.

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PostPosted: Mon May 17, 2010 9:46 pm 
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Irish Princess
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No roid updates lately, screeling? How they doing?

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Do ever want to just grab someone and say...WTF is wrong with you?


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PostPosted: Mon May 17, 2010 11:50 pm 
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Asian Blonde

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eat lots of fibre... lots and lots...


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PostPosted: Tue May 18, 2010 9:47 am 
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Deuce Master

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They're better than they were a month ago, but there's still pain. It doesn't seem to get worse, but it doesn't get better. I'm calling them back today to go in for a second time. *sigh*

And I eat TONS of fiber. I basically eat a double bowl of Frosted Mini Wheats and I eat at least 4 pieces of fruit a day. Even though the crap mostly slides out, it still hurts.

That reminds me though... I had a dump so huge it took 3 flushes just to get it down without even toilet paper in the bowl. I happened to be surfing the web on my Droid at the time so beware: I'm prepared to answer the challenge of "pics or it didn't happen."

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PostPosted: Tue May 18, 2010 1:36 pm 
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Mountain Man
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/flashes Bowl-buster gang signs

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PostPosted: Tue May 25, 2010 2:11 pm 
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Irish Princess
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A dump that took 3 flushes? Wow...epic!

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Do ever want to just grab someone and say...WTF is wrong with you?


Dream as if you'll live forever...
...Live as if you'll die tomorrow


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PostPosted: Tue May 25, 2010 2:12 pm 
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I got nothin.
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Kirra wrote:
A dump that took 3 flushes? Wow...epic!


It was at least 7.23 Courics!

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Holy shitsnacks!


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 01, 2010 9:24 am 
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Deuce Master

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So had another one of those procedures on Friday. Outlook is pretty good right now. It barely hurt yesterday and lets just say I added a lot of meat to the stew.

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